NO MORE BALLERINA BLUES



I might very well be at that show. Still working out my scheduling... but it's looking good.

Last night I was in bed by 11pm. I've officially grown old. However, my brain was racing and my body itching uncontrollably. Much against everyone's advice, I decided to start watching Trainspotting. I haven't watched that movie in about a year or 3, and it's one of my favorites. I used to watching it every day, fantacizing about going to Scotland and meeting boys that look like Renton and dancing to Blondie and making out to Pulp, and the my early 20s happened and I did that over and over again. I was no longer the 16 year old sophomore befriending a boy that had a shaved head and bruises on his arms because I thought he was on heroin (he wasn't). I was the 23 year old cackling because she met yet another dude who had actually gone to rehab.

So i sat in bed, itchy for no reason, attempting to watch Trainspotting. The beginning was fun -- watching a young Ewan McGregor flying through the streets in a yellow pallor, mindlessly laughing. I watched as drugs were injected and the monologue about not caring about a thing because of heroin. I watched for about 30 seconds more after a girl declares heroin better than any meat injection, and turned changed the channel. It's weird that what was once a glamorized fantasy is now a harrowing nightmare. I've seen people sick like that. Feared for their lives. Prayed that they'd get a less waxy complexion sooner than later... suddenly it all seemed too real.

I needed something less real.

So i put on 'Curb Your Enthusiasm' and was giggling in bed. Laughing uncontrollably. Jeff Greene is probably my favorite side-kick ever. He's perfect. Nothing Larry can do is wrong. He will take Larry's side on basically anything (except when it comes to dressing like Wizard of Oz characters). He adds nothing to grounding Larry. He feed's his crazy. He's warm and thoughtful. He's great. Sometimes I wonder if I'm Larry or David when I'm talking to Karen. Neither one of us will really disagree with the other ever, and almost always take a person's side on basically anything (sometimes we disagree on what party to go to or some shit). Thoughts on this Karen?