Thursday, May 27, 2004

This morning was one of those mornings when I woke up and looked at the ceiling thinking "Where does this story begin? How did i get here?" To be honest, I wrote that sentence a few hours ago and have the worst case of ADD today that I just haven't been able to write beyond that line. Now I've had a cup of coffee and am gonna try my best.

So I forced Karen to drop her plans and join me for the Living Things/Velvet Revolver show at Roseland that night. Her plans, previously, had consisted of going to BBKings to see the singer of Squeeze perform an acoustic set. As if she reallly wanted to do that! So after work I went with the co-workers to Passerby in the art district for send-off drinks for those who have decided to leave SPIN. I decided to make it an "exception night" and had a couple of beers and a half hour later i was on my way to the show with my editor, Doug, to meet up with Karen.

You know how in the 4 questions of the Haggedah you ask "why is this night different from any other?" (well, you might not know if you're not a jew, but we ask that). Well, Karen and I stood around asking just that. There we were in a venue we both know all too well, and yet, there was not a single familiar face in the house. Thankfully, I was already sauced and hyper from the beer and redbull i had ingested that i sort of bounced off the walls.

The main reason I went to the show was to see my friend Eve's band, The Living Things. I hadn't seen them since they opened for the Libertines back in the summer when Barry was still 19. Doug had seen them at CBGBs a couple weeks earlier and said it was one of the best rock shows he's ever seen, so I was like "hot damn! i'm coming!" i mean "I'm going!" or whatever. Their show was great and Lillian, Eve's brother (btw, Eve is a dude as well, and their brother who plays drums is named Bosh), is a great frontman. He stripped off his shirt and performed topless much to mine and Karen's pleasure, and even brought out a couple of ladies dressed in lingerie and Bush and Rumsfeld masks who started to dry hump each other on stage while Lillian took a gun shaped lighter and lit a photo of the President, during which he urged the audience to not vote for Bush. To give you an idea of what the crowd was like, some meathead started calling Lillian the "n" word (which is beyond bizarre for many reasons including the awfulness of that word and the fact that the only thing black about Lillian is his clothing and maybe his ability to grow a jew-fro). Anyway, that audience member is a retarded pussy who refused Lil's request for him to come on stage and duke it out. This dude's friends were beyond embarrassed according to band members who saw the whole thing from stage. The thing I didn't like about the show, which wasn't the band's fault, was that you could hardly hear them. Apparently the VR didn't want the openers to be louder then them.

Karen and I walked around a bit, did a bit of people watching, and I spotted someone who looked really familiar. "Hey look!" I said to Karen, "It's the singer of the Charlatans UK!" I went up to see if it was him. He said no. I walked away thinking "that's so weird, it looked just like him." Um... Yeah, i'm a total douche. It was the singer of the Stereophonics and I totally got the bands confused. Yeah, guess who's a fucking retard. Me.


So the Velvet Revolver took to the stage and Weiland, who is undeniably hot as fucking hell, came out dressed like the gay police officer from the Village People and started doing his snake dance. Karen and I spotted this dude walking around with the tightest pants ever, cowboy boots, and a furry jacket with no shirt on underneath. He looked like the love child of Justin Hawkins of the Darkness and Rob Harvey of the Music AND Slash. I ran over to him so i could get a photo with him cause his look was just too unbelievable, and he was more then excited to pose with us. The boy was created to be photographed... and the boy had a sort of business card that was his photo and web address. The boy's name was Lips Velvet. Please check out his website so you have an idea of what the fuck i'm talking about.

After I posed with Mr. Velvet, Eve came to get me and Karen to bring us to the VIP area, but Karen decided that she had enough of the Velvet Revolver and decided to head down to the east village for the Radio4 listening party at HiFi where she canoodled with famous hipsters and tried to convert them all to H.I.M.... meanwhile, I failed at turning down Eve's offers of alcoholic beverages (he's like "I KNOW FOR A FACT that you have "exception" nights for your drinking. I read your blog. This is one of those nights. Now what do you want?" bless that boy). I danced like a snake with the LivingThings as we freaked out whenever the VR played G'n'R songs or STP songs... and especially when they covered Nirvana's "Negative Creep." Does Tommy Hillfiger have a brother who looks exactly like him? Cause if so, he was there with Michael H, who is NEVER without his sunglasses apparently. Also, Cory, who is not a Berlin Brother but from St. Louis and in the Living Things, looks exactly like a younger and healthier version of Scott Weiland. It was uncanny. He's officially the New Cory. As in, move over Corey Haim and Feldman, there's a new Cory in town and he spells his name without the e.

After the show I went with the Brothers Berlin to the Hotel Gansevoort for the Clive Davis/Velvet Revolver party. We loaded up on the booze and chased the dudes down who were carrying plates of food since we're all broke and I forgot to eat dinner that night. The party seemed like something out of a Hollywood party and so i drank to forget where I was. Whenever I go to these events, the record company parties, I'm like, "oh, i really dont belong here." and wait patiently for someone to realize that I've crashed the party and kick me out. They never did. I swear, the next time i attend a party on that deck, and it's above 80 degrees, i'm jumping in the pool with all my clothes on. Up until now, NYC just hasn't really bought into that whole "hey, my name is mr. weather, i'm gonna be hot now," instead, i've been wearing lots of layers.

Justine D showed up and brought some of her own personal sunshine. It's always lovely to see her! When we were all fed up with the free food and booze we all hopped in cabs and headed off to Plaid, which was really empty, and i gave up and went home leaving the kids dressed in black to wander the streets alone in the rain.

The end.

By the way, I just got the Sons&Daughters EP and it's really fucking great. I guess the songs I downloaded off the internet just didn't do their recording a lot of justice because the EP totally captures the live show really well. I mean, you dont get to see a quartet of half really hot boys and half really hot girls singing and dancing while you listen to it, but it's close enough. They're gonna tour with Franz Ferdinand, so be sure to check them out.

The Killers were on MTV a couple days ago as a You Hear it First. I haven't been able to find the link to the segment, but if you go to their website you can see their music videos. I'm going to a prom with Mark Killers. I'm excited!

If Dan Marcus were still in high school, he would've jumped on a plane to find this gigantic mushroom.

Someone thinks that Damon Albarn is a cunt. They may or may not be right, but either way, he's still fucking hot.

Rob from Morning Theft has gotten me into the Sheila Divine again. Please check out their song "Hum" by going here. In fact, the whole album is really good... I just really love that song a lot.

Planet Family Guy for those who are as obsessed as me.

Radiohead gone Yeehaw!. Definitely listen! Link from Adam Berger.

This cat is screwed!


Brennan said...

Whoa.. Reading that almost gave me a hangover!

Steve said...

Already got my tickets for the Franz/Sons&Daughters show. Looks to be hot and sold out.

laura said...

KELLY JONES IS A FUCKING CUNT. I'm glad you didn't know who he was. I HATE THE STEREOBOLLOCKS. you should have killed him. Tim Burgess = awesome, Kelly Jones = balls.

solace said...

that Sheila Divine song is soooo f'n good, i'd almost forgotten about it, thanks :)

solace said...

holy fuck, that Rodeohead medley is the best mp3 in the entire universe, no lie.

householder said...

hey yo. nice blog. atta girl. drunk girls are sexy. drunk naked girls are sexier. well not as sexy as me.


Nailz said...

I agree with Laura on the above post. PS. That Damon Albarn thing made me laugh. A lot.... I want to start a Sarah-Needs-To-Get-Drunk-At-Every-Opportunity petition. Who's with me? Fuck this sober shit, it doesn't suit you... :) x

Marcus said...

If I were still in high school, I wouldn't have had nearly enough money to jump in a plane to the Congo to find a mushroom. I probably, however, would have jumped on a raft. Mmmmm, mushrooms.

Sarah said...

Marcus -- true... I guess what I'm trying to say is that you would've done whatever you had to do -- you would've applied that FUCKING PERFECT SCORE YOU GOT ON THE SATS -- to getting to that mushroom.

Anonymous said...

sarah, i'm 99.alot% sure that i go to school w/ that lipsvelvet character... every time i see him out, i'm baffled by his uber-skinnyness, and in binghamton, ny, he sticks out like the sorest thumb that ever was, i love it. the white cowboy boots are so boss. 'tis all.

holmes said...

yeah, the sheila divine were so fucking good. everyone should really give the CD "new parade" a chance. sooooo goooooood.

Anonymous said...

I like reading your blog but for Christ's sake, Velvet fucking Revolver? They blow.