SIGNS O THE TIMES

OMG

I don't mean to be a bumout, but this is truly awful.

And this is just plain horrific.

I don't really know how to fathom all this. I'm going to say a prayer for these people, find some money to donate, and hope for the best for the new year.

MMMBOP

I was going through my files today and found this photo from about a year ago. I was never a big fan cause when they hit big I was only able to hear sounds in the frequencey of Smiths. But since I like men with girlish faces, I've always thought Taylor was pretty hot, and from what i remember of this day, he remained hot... and girlish. The little one giving me a chokehold was being totally antagonistic, and the oldest one, Isaaaaac, was really nice and liked Interpol a lot. Anyway, I have no reason to share this other than the fact that i thought it was pretty funny.

Also, my friend Costa sent me a link to a song cause he thought I might like it and now I can't stop listening to it. So right click/save as and give it a whirl. Oh, they're called The Spinto Band... I haven't looked at their site yet... just got the link.

NOAH'S ARK?

I wonder if there's anyway for scientists to figure out a way to study the activities of animals so they can better prepare for natural disaters like the Tsumani (that is, of course, if they're not already). This article is fascinating:

Where Are All the Dead Animals?
Wed Dec 29,10:19 AM ET
COLOMBO (Reuters) - Sri Lankan wildlife officials are stunned -- the worst tsunami in memory has killed around 22,000 people along the Indian Ocean island's coast, but they can't find any dead animals.

On a whole nother note, I've been telling people that i got the same feeling with the oohlas as I did when I first heard Interpol, the Killers, and Muse. I can't wait to send these singles out cause balls are gonna blow, things are gonna explode...etc. The songs on my EP are different than the ones on their myspace page, but you should check those out as well. And if you manage to find their song "the rapid" on a downloading service, download it immediately. A friend of mine just spent 10 minutes telling me how much he is blown away by that song.

SO MUCH EMO. SO LITTLE TIME.

I'm opening my mail today, finally, and find myself drowning in CDs. Tons of it is emo, which is ok. I love emo. If i were to describe my personal style at the moment, it'd be emopostpunkgoth. This is if i were in a bin at my favorite store, Hot Topic.

Anyway, it's come to my realization that My Chemical Romance raised the bar of emo for the rest of time. If you're in an emo band and you're interested in being good, listen to Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge, and figure out a way to sound better than that.

I know that emo is like a four letter word. I dont care. You all know what I'm talking about when i say emo, right? So that's why i'm using it.

NEON BALLROOM

Um... Total buzz: Daniel Johns from Silverchair is hot. Could he be the new Federline? Developing.

GOD BLESS THE INTERNET

First it's hot pieces of ass, now it's this.

Thank you Mikey.

EDIT: My Brother sent me the original video. It's by a band called Ozone from Romania. He said he heard someone DJ it at Misshapes, which makes sense, since the song made me Gay. The video made me gayer (as if that's possible!).

AND NOW A LITTLE SOMETHING FOR THE LADIES

I'll take Mr. January through December.

Does anyone have MP3s of that band Gene that they can hook me up with? thanks, yo.

OK. it's 4:37 now. it's time for me to get to sleep. goodnight.

FOR THOSE ASKING ABOUT THE MISSHAPES PARTY

the phone number on the flyer is a fax machine, the real # is 212-519-6677

WOOD: CANADIAN ROCK STAR?

Elijah Wood and his sister went shopping the other day and revealed that they were actually Deryk & Avril. Revealed! Developing! Etc.

Also, a friend of mine sent me the following email that makes any of my NYC misadventures seem tame:

flew into vail wednessday. got picked up in a car and made the trek to aspen. the most gorgeous hour and half drive ever. got to the sky hotel and crashed. woke up and met the fam for dinner. went out after dinner. the fam left early and i continued on. i met a guy from orange county. he used to move coke by the keys. he gave me more shit then i knew what to do with. so much so that i think i threw away much of it. crawled into bed around 5.

thursday. shopped a little. went to some after ski lounges. peeped on the hottest women i have ever seen. and coming from orange county thats a bold fucking statement. went out to dinner. the guy i met the night before took me out to the clubs/bars to get a real tast of aspen and all the beautiful women that live there. hit up 4 different clubs/bars. the fucker kept giving me more blow again. dont remember much from this night.

friday. turned phone off to avoid temptation. more shopping. saw celebs everywhere. went to dinner. back to the hotel to sleep.

saturday. the big day. boarded ajax mountain. went to christmas dinner at the st regis hotel. then went back to my hotel to try to get into a party that was thrown by will smith and mariah carey. saw usher. while waiting to get in i met the HOTTEST fucking girl ever. i was ordering drinks and i saw her and like a bitch i walked away without saying a word. while talking to my mom she walked by me and threw the biggest smile my way. i knew then i had to talk to her. she opened her mouth and i fell in love. she was an aussie with black hair tan skin and spoke with an english accent because she lived in london for a few years. i finally got into the party and took her with me. met a bunch of people inside. saw carson from queer eye and fucking ryan seacrest. those were the only two assholes that stand out like soar thumbs. i suck at recognizing people. went to some more bars with emma my love, my sister, and some other cool peeps i met. while waiting for the girls to barter our way into a club the dealer popped out. immediately we were all let in. he filled my pockets full of more christmas snow. i met a cougar inside another bar. she asked me what i did and i said i was a ski intructor. she gave me her number for private lessons and anything else i could offer her privately. went back to my place for the after party around 4 with a bunch of drunks. never slept.

sunday. went straight to some ranch to go snowmobiling. saw more amazing scenery. got back to the hotel and slept for 20 minutes. woke up. boarded again. went to dinner. ran into carrot top. hit up a couple bars and then called it a trip.

in summation. aspen is beautiful and partys harder then any other place ive been to so far. its filled with beautiful women. the one thing that sucked was falling in love my last night. i cant wait to go back in february. oh and, drugs are bad.

HELP?

Does anyone know of any relief organizations people can donate their time and money to which will help the victims in Asia?

THE CHORNICLES OF AWESOME

Whomever at the New York Post wrote this, Maxine, you're a fucking genius. A genius I say! Now, tell me something, have you been hiding in my closet while I watch Fuse's Daily Download that i Tivo every day or what? Are you like "Hmm... Sarah's rewound the following videos 89 times: Good Charlotte's "I Just Wanna Live," My Chemical Romance's "I'm Not OK," and Muse's "Time is Running Out"...."

Now that that's out of the way, someone please tell me who makes this amazing jacket that Nicole Richie is wearing.

Also, people have been asking me what I'm doing for New Years Eve.... Well, here you go.

A Very Special MisShapes New Years. Featuring Peaches and VIP! I know it's a bit pricey, but there's gonna be some sweet gift bags and i think some free drinks (but dont quote me on that!)

And then I'm heading over to Motherfucker to see The Bravery.

A warning to my friends: I will be drinking on New Years. I'm not an alcoholic, so I have no need to banish alcohol from my life completely. Please feel free to hold back my hair at appropriate times.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

I love Christmastime. People are happy and lugging their presents around with huge smiles on their faces anticipating what they'll get in return. It's really quite sweet and at the same time, I'm sort of relieved that I don't celebrate it cause I don't think I could afford it. I applaud those with Christmas bonuses who know how to spend it wisely.

I also enjoy Christmas becuase the Discover Channel is usually running amazing shows about the birth of Jesus and other interesting stories about biblical events (passover/easter is another great time to watch the discover/history channel). It's also a fun time of the year to go to the movies with your non-christmas celebrating friends and eat chinese food. This is actually a custom referred to as a Jewish Christmas... however, I've noticed that the goyim have joined in on this custom. That's fine.

I skipped out from normal Christmas Eve activity to spend time at my parent's house. I dyed my hair. My hair, she is black. Now I look like Ashlee Simpson again. I'm like me, circa summer 2003. My mom is gonna have a cow when she wakes up and she's gonna make me wash my hair with detergent so it's not such a harsh black. NOT THIS TIME MOM! I'M AN ADULT NOW!

Also, I've rediscoverd Pleasure Club and I suggest you give them a listen. They're along the same lines as LouisXIV, if LXIV came from New Orlenes and practice black magic and voodoo. I remember seeing PC live once and I'd never seen eyes more haunted than the singer's. Enjoy. NP: Here Comes The Trick.

I'd like to wish everyone a happy and healthy Christmas by sharing this photo with you. It's my friend, Hardcore Dave's brother's pug. I call him Monkey:

YES, I LIKE LINKIN PARK. WHAT? WHAT?

And it looks like Josh Groban does too... well, enough to cover "My December." (right click, save as)

CHICKEN, MEET THE EGG

I found this photo of the Olsen twins on MySpace and was totally fucking stoked.


And then I was looking at my MySpace photos and was shocked by the similarity... Did i say shocked? I mean TOTALLY FUCKIGN STOKED:

I'VE GOT THE BALLERINA BLUES

Tuesday night SPIN had our annual Christmas (Jews are invited too!) Party for staffers. Being on the sober tip, and finding myself breaking the news to the higher ups (much to their dismay... no, i will no longer be your drunken party monkey... i will still be the party monkey tho), I spent the night nursing a seltzer. The seltzer got mixed up in a sea of Gin and Tonics and when I sipped from the wrong straw I winced. Is it possible that I've actually managed to kill ALL desire for alcohol? I don't have any cravings at all. I go out fairly regularly, and I've had more drink offers than I could ever remember, and have managed to feel absolutely no pressure to drink. None.

This sobriety made my trip to LA last week all the more tolerable. Previously I would be bummed out about not being able to drink since I'd have to drive. Or bummed that I had to rely on a designated driver to get around, but this time around I was the DD. I was the one behind the wheels. Those wheels in question belonged to a white pick up truck that my friend dubbed "The Lesbian Truck." Sexy.

Now that I don't drink, I suddenly want to dress better. For the past year or two, I guess since the Strokes made it fashionable to wear tshirts and jeans, I've been dressing like I could care less. I mean, there's another reason other than what's fashionable... I'm very lazy sometimes. But The Vicar, who has dealt with my clothing indifference for the past 3 or so months, has had enough and is trying to reign me in fashion-wise. Slowly, but surely, I'll be dressing like I used to when I was a youth. The other day we spent about an hour talking about how awesome wearing white was. When I told him "I'm confused, a few months ago you pointed out a guy wearing all white and said it looked bad and dated... so it's not?" He said "I said that? I'd like to go back in time and tell the guy he's got style." Like two gay men, we sit and talk about shit like this.

I just hate looking like I've made an effort... which sounds retarded. But I wake up in the morning, climb into the same pair of pants i've been wearing for the past 2 weeks and grab whatever shirt smells the least. It stems from this one time when i was 13 and went over to this boy's house that I liked... his sister told my brother that i had come all dolled up. I thought I looked cute and was proud of the outfit I put together. But my bro passed the comment on to me and I felt embarrassed, and since then, I've made LITTLE effort with whatever I've worn, unless it was a shirt I made or something. But rarely do I plan an entire outfit. Rarely do I want to look like I've made the slightest effort to look good. This is incredibly stupid of me. I love fashion. I went to the Fashion Institute of Technology for goodness sakes. I need to stop suppressing my eagerness to make an "outfit" out of clothes. I've been looking at the Misshapes Gallery for inspiration. It's been inspiring. I'm inspired.

I made a positive step forward while I was in LA last week and finally got my haircut. I previously attempted to get it cut back in June (? i think ?), but the hair dresser charged me a retarded amount of money and didnt even take off my split ends. Amy highly recommended her Swedish friend Nicholas from the band Last Amanda (whose band I coincidentally once posted a photo of on this blog and said "they look swedish"... turns out i was right. weird). Naturally, I was a little worried about getting my haricut by someone I didn't know, and who had no professional training, but I decided to take a risk already. My hair was out of shape, and there wasn't really anywhere else to go but up. So Amy arranged for Nicholas to come over to her house after the Revolution Smile show. I met Nicholas at the show and assured me that he was pacing his drinking that night (since he'd be cutting my hair with a razor). I urged him to get drunk. I saw the haircut he did on someone else, loved it, and knew I'd be in good hands.

A group of us went back to Amy's and it turned into a drunken make over party sponsored by Del Taco (wayyyyyy better than Taco Bell, btw... mmm... veggie supreme). Nicholas cut my hair in the kitchen while everyone stood around getting drunk, eating burritos and arm wrestling. He went conservative at first, not knowing how i'd feel about it (I gave him a photo of Stacy Dupri from Eisley that I found in Nylon) and then I told him to just do what he wanted. He did a great job and I urged him to shave one of the sides so i could be like Annabel from Bow Wow Wow. I dont have any good photos of my haircut, but I'm totally stoked on it. Especially since I've gotten a ceramic hair straightener ($120... totally worth it, i swear, it's a life changer).

Anyway, last night I went to Lit to meet up with Mat, Colleen, Sarah Wilson, John Davis and Chris, and the Nightmare of You boys that I'm adopting. They're the next Brand New, I think, or will be occupying that place in my heart. Minus the Nightmare boys we headed to the Darkroom (cause it's the new Lit... until Bar Eleven is the new Darkroom). I was reminded that the next Kill Hannah album is gonna sound a lot more like their old stuff, which makes me really happy cause that's the fucking jam... so I've been on an old school Kill Hannah tip all afternoon.

By the way, I've been getting endlessesly accosted about my brass knuckles necklace. You can buy it here. I personally keep it on hand for times that I need to regulate.

I think this post needs to end ... NOW.

PONDER...

Ever look at a midget and wonder what they'd look like if they were actual size? Me too.

STRANGE REQUEST

Ultragrrrl: what you up to?
battjer: trying to find a girl willing to eat pussy for the first time who will let me write about it (anonymously).
battjer: totally anonymous. the pussies belong to several cute volunteers from which you can take your pick!
battjer: please email brianbattjer@hotmail.com
battjer: had someone and they backed out and i have a thur morning deadline.

I wont do it because, little known fact, vaginas scare the shit out of me.

YAY FOR BROTHERS

If you've ever wondered how i got such thick skin, try having my brother. He rules and turned me onto some great music... but we pretty much fought for about 17 or 18 years until I played him Interpol for the first time, and then we became friends. But every once in a while he likes to put me in my place:

LVLewitinn: btw, you should start a rumor that Brandon Flowers got where he did because he's secretly your twin brother
Ultragrrrl: haha
Ultragrrrl: we really do look alike, right?
LVLewitinn: only in that picture
LVLewitinn: big head
LVLewitinn: like a special person
Ultragrrrl: hahahah
LVLewitinn: HURRAYYYY!!!! I LOVE THE KILLERS!!! HURRAYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
LVLewitinn: that's you

THERE ARE TOO MANY PEOPLE HERE

Um... I'm getting more obsessed with The Oohlas by the second. None of the songs that are on their site are on the single i'm putting out (the songs that will be on there are "gone," "cuhenga shuffle," and "slo-mo disco and refuse"), but the songs on their site are really great. Listen to them. I'm also gonna start dressing like Ollie i think.

WE'RE TALKING TO YOU, MISTER!

Lindsay is very intercontinental. She knows how to say "fuck off" in two languages, at least.

Here she is doing it in New English:



And here she is doing it in Old English:



Maybe she learned something from me and Coldplay while reading SPIN a few years ago:

BUT HEY, WHO'S ON TRIAL?

The new Interpol video for "Evil" is so bad, that it's good. It's like, someone needs to stop making decisions while stoned out of their mind cause I dont know if everyone is gonna love it as much as I do.

I know that in like, 2 seconds i'm gonna be like "this video is fucking genius." i find the puppet's mouth totally captivating.

Interpol are supposed to be this "serious" band who are nothing but black and macabre and shit, and this video is that, but with a giant puppet playing the part of Paul Banks... I think it's Paul, he's got his lips. And this song is so serious and maybe one of the best songs they've ever written -- not couting the 3 or 4 others on this album that I'd give the same title of that too -- and the fact that they went with this as the video concept is pretty fucking awesome.

Ok, so it's been more than two seconds. Yup, this video is like 2005's "Paranoid Android."

I'd like to suggest you smoke a fat one before watching this.

HELLO. MY NAME IS: VERY GOOD LOOKING


Image taken from Dreamcaps, sent in by Dan of Mighty.

Last night I hung out with some dudes and they were all going gay for Brandon. Straight dudes, mind you, who are in bands, who, at the mention of Brandon's name or the Killers, turn into 13 year old girls.

KarenRTAG: can you believe that video?
KarenRTAG:Ultragrrrl: i told brando that it made my vagina explode.
KarenRTAG: you are so foul with all these vagina explosions

Thank you fo

GOODNESS!

Remember in grade school when you'd get milk during lunch in small cartons and sometimes they were a bit frozen so you had to drink slightly frozen milk? That's what the contents of my boobs are like right now. That's how fucking cold it is outside in NYC. Oh, I long for the sunny warm weather of LA.

Last night I got a text from Hardcore Dave -- he's a manager at Swingers in LA (try their Ahi Tuna sandwich, it's amazing), and I'd been going there a lot while i was out west hoping to spend some time with him and to have a run-in with an Olsen twin -- anyway, while i was tucked away in my freezing cold bed in NYC, his text read "One of the olsen's just came into swingers."

I could've died.

This photo of Kevin Federline makes me feel a bit better:

FINE, BUT DOES HE DO THE PIZZA MAKER?

I'd like to thank The Revolution Smile for introducing me to Santa Mosh. WATCH IT. Especially if your name is Brian.

SMILE LIKE YOU MEAN IT

Hola Los Angeles Amigos!

The Revolution Smile is performing Saturday night at Spaceland. If you're reading this now, that means, technically, tonight, December 18. The Rev Smile's singer, Shaun Lopez, used to be in Far and he's an all around great guy and I've been sleeping in his studio for the past week. It's very comfortable with wireless internet, a fridge stocked with sugfree redbull, and cable tv. Not to mention all the lovely recording equiptment I've been toying with at 3am writing my soon to be pop sensations.

But in all seriousness, The Revolution Smile are great and the line-up has changed a bit, so it's definitely worth checking out.

THEY ARE APARTMENT

I was dolled up and ready to roll out of the house to meet up with Ollie when she called in sick. So here I am, back where I started, on amy's couch searching the nerd. I went on to the website for my friend's band Apartment and realized that they've got song clips up there. I'd like to suggest you download the track "Patience is Proving." It's the band's least favorite song, but one of my favorites (well, that and this song "People" that they dislike so much that they don't have it available to download... boo!).

LOGIC, PLEASE

Last night I went to my friend Baron's house in the brOC and his bathroom was carpeted. I flipped out. WHO THE FUCK THINKS IT'S A GOOD IDEA TO HAVE A CARPETED BATHROOM.

Baron's reasoning "the tiles get really cold," wasnt good enough for me in comparison to me saying "yeah, but fungus grows from the carpet being wet. dude, gross."

If you can tell me a good reason to carpet your bathroom, i'd really appreciate it: slewitinn@spin.com

THE FIRST OF THE GANG TO ...

Yesterday morning I picked up Ollie and we went to the Happiest Place on Earth: Disneyland.

It was surprisingly un-chaotic and we got to ride all the fun rides that we wanted to ride.

We even met famous people like Santa Claus!! Could you believe he was just sitting around, chilling out?



I tried to find Cruella DeVille, but she was being a total bitch and that made me bummed:



The Haunted Mansion became the Nightmare Before Xmas Haunted Mansion, and Ollie, who happens to know a lot of really interesting secrets about Disneyland, pointed out a giant spider on the glass that separated the riders and a ballroom of dancing ghosts. "See that spider?" she said, "years ago a guy came onto this ride with a gun and shot the glass. the glass is part of the entire structure of the building and it'd be too hard to remove and change it so they just put a spider there to cover the hole."

After we rode all the rides we went to the brOC to meet up with our buddies Kris and Baron.

Everyone got way drunk, cept for me, cause I don't drink anymore, and i was driving. Look! I'm sitting next to Kevin Federline!!



Then I drove Baron and Ollie home and we called my friend Rob and Ronnie from the Killers and left them drunk messages of us singing "Midnight Show" and "Mr. Brightside." Sadly, I wasn't drunk, but sung perfectly offkey as if i was.

I'M LOVING (LOS) ANGELS INSTEAD

This morning, after being awaken by my family members who have forgotten that the west coast is three hours behind the east coast, I decided to hop in my white pick-up truck and search for that Starbucks that Amy gave me directions to the day before. I dove around for a while until I decided to just go to the busy street that I take to get to the canyon. I started driving and driving figuring that eventually I'd find a Starbucks. The further I drove, the more run down the stores and houses became until I decided that the chances of a Starbucks being located next to a 99 cent store and a check cashing point was probably not likely. So I turned right, down a random street, so i could return back home.

I got to my first corner and saw a bunch of guys standing in a cluster on the corner. This particular corner was fairly run down and there was a pretty nice car standing still in front of me. The guys looked like they were waiting for either a bus or a drug deal, and since there weren't any bus stops near by, I assumed they were up to no good. I got totally excited. I kept on thinking "This is so awesome. This is totally like out of a movie like 'Boyz in Da Hood' or 'Friday,' cool!" So I took a photo with my sidekick with intentions to send them to my friends back home saying "look! check it out! it's like from one of those movies!" One of the guys standing on the corner saw me waiting for the SUV ahead of me to move and motioned for me to just go around it. I thought to myself "OK, be cool. Nothing is gonna happen to you and besides, you totally left your new ipod at home." So I drove around the corner, and what do you know... they were shooting a movie. Figures.

SMOOOOOSH

The Five O'Clock Heroes are playing on thursday at Bar 13 for the Broadcast party. That's a free party with really great DJs, and the band is really fucking great. My friends saw them in London after they'd been touring, and told me that they liked them more than some other new york band whose name I wont mention. Anyway, the've got this song that i love called "Run to Her"... but my other friends like their other stuff. I'm a purist, i guess.

When I get rich, I'm gonna buy one of these. It's the future.


See, it's all smooshed and likes to go sight seeing. I bet it's listening to Army of Me's "Come Down To DC" (they're playing at the Delancey on Thursday, in NYC).

WE FOUND THE LIGHT!

The Arcade Fire - February 1 - Bowery Ballroom ... on sale now on ticketweb.com

Thank you Dan Marcus!

WE FOUND THE LIGHT!

The Arcade Fire - February 1 - Bowery Ballroom ... on sale now on ticketweb.com

Thank you Dan Marcus!

BY THE WAY...

Lindsay Lohan has some big ass titties.

WE LOOK TO LOS ANGELES FOR THE LANGUAGE WE USE... LONDON IS DEAD

Ah, Viva Morrissey. I'm too much in love with him. He manages to be incredibly British, but at the same time, LA. I think it's the Smiths Vs. Morrissey aspect. The Smiths are about being dark, hopeless, melancholic... much like England. Much like the dark, gray, melancholic England with their carpeted bathrooms (seriously british people, what THE FUCK is up with the carpeted bathrooms? where in your minds did you think "ok, this room is gonna get really wet and soggy constantly from a shower, so let's carpet it and see what grows!" ... or was there no concern cause you don't really shower that much?). Morrissey is melancholic but hopeful. Like, here I am, penniless and talentless, but i'm gonna make it, even if it means mopping these tiled bathrooms of these famous people.

Anyway... My point is that I'm in Los Angeles today. I'll be here for a week. I've rented a giant white truck from Enterprise and I've been driving around from Starbucks to Starbucks, it seems.

Tomorrow night, I'll be DJing at Cinespace and The Oohlas will be playing at around 10:30pm.

Here's the flyer:

DESTINY IS CALLING ME

My computer at work has been acting postivily retarded for the past week. This is why I haven't been able to update for some time -- not until now, when my roommate Niki got home and brought her computer with her.

Has anyone seen the new video for the Killers' "Mr. Brightside"? I have a totally abstract crush on Brandon Flowers, but when I see that video, that abstract crush is a totally full-on crush and my vagina explodes. When I told him this, which i did cause I've got no shame, he was blown away from that term and asked if that was a good thing. Yes, it's a good thing. H-E-A-R-T-T-H-R-O-B.

Anyway, I've put for sale the next stolen transmission single. I wont be able to send these out til after the holidays, unfortunately, but you can buy it now! It's for the oohlas. They'll be playing on tuesday at Cinespace in LA (and I'll be DJing! cause i'm gonna be in LA as of tomorrow for a week), and my vagina explodes for them.

You can also buy both that single and the Louis XIV one for $7 if you buy them together. I only have a few copies of the Louis XIV single left, so hurry up!

Anyway, I've been dying to write about going to DC last weekend.

So friday rolled around, and i took the Chinatown express in NYC to the lovely Chinatown in DC. The ride was boring, as you might expect and I spent the entire time needing to eat and salivating as we drove by all the rest stops. My head was hurting since I only had one redbull that day (as opposed to the normal four i've been rocking while on "The (not so) Healthy (but effective) Diet of Champions" -- which includes four redbulls a day, a 3x shot venti cappuchino, and two lovely Peanutbutter Chocolate Zone bars ... sometimes I get chest pains).

Army of Vintz picked me up and we went to meet up with the Vicar (who was down there as well) at uh... Coyote Ugly. A friend of theirs had to go see someone's band, so we just hung out and I nursed a seltzer water -- despite the Vicar urging me to drink by saying that it's ok, since we were in DC and nobody would know -- and cheered on the bartenders when they hopped on stage and cheered on the cover band that played songs I had forgotten.

Afterwards we went to the Black Cat, which i was told, is the only cool bar to go to in DC. Turns out that Daniel was in town as well, so we had some veggie burgers in their little vegetarian restaurant with the Vic's friend Danny and returned to the RedRoom so I could absorb DC and kill the Vicar by spraying on too much Michael Kors perfume.

Then we went back to Vintz house and chilled out there. I was staying there and ended up going to bed giggling cause we all totally had a sleepover and were making fart jokes the whole night. We're mature, incase you didn't notice.

Saturday came and we went to the HSFest. I ended up going to that because I originally was gonna go to the KROQ almost acoustic xmas, but turns out my little cousin is having a Bar Mitzvah tomorrow, which made that impossible for me. Family first. Everything else second... as much as possible.

So HSFest was the closest i could get to a dream line up that wasnt the KROQ show, which I can't really think about without wanting to cry. It was like the HSF people were like "OK, apart from Muse and Interpol, what bands can we have play that will make Sarah blow a load?" and what they came up with was...
My Chemical Romance, The Killers, Franz Ferdinand, Jimmy Eat World, Keane, Good Charlotte and Velvet Revolver.

MCR were fucking awesome, as usual. Gerard's voice was failing him a bit, but that just meant that he got to sing the songs a bit differently. And Frankie is a fucking dream boat, and Mikey is Mikey -- which is to say that he's awesome.

After their set the Killers showed up and some of the other bands were dying to meet them cause everyone loves the killers (including people voting for the grammys i hope). Brandon is one good looking fella, and so not only were the dudes in other bands stoked to meet their new favorite band, but they were also gossiping about how good looking he was -- in a totally non gay way. People are just kinda endeared by him, cause he's endearing. It's the Morman charm.

Mikey was stoked cause Bob from Franz said hello to him. I told him that he must've been giving him the bassist hello -- which i assume is like a secret handshake. People were stoked to meet other people, and I was stoked cause I got to see a bunch of friends in one place all at once. Plus, there was a huge case of redbull sitting around, and Mikey gave me a meal ticket (literally) so I got to eat, get caffinated, listen to awesome bands, and smile for about 10 hours straight.

The Killers set was amazing. The Vicar and I stood around dancing and singing along and going "oh my god, they're so good." I will be bummed out when I'm bored at one of their shows.

Franz Ferdinand were great, but, and I really hate to be "one of those people," but i miss seeing them in small venues. Or maybe something is missing. There was once this sexual energy between the band members, and their show at SXSW remains one of the best live show experiences of my entire life, but at the show in DC, it just wasnt there. They're all obviously still friends and enjoy each other's company, but maybe they need to do something to add spice to their relationship, like an old married couple.

Mind you, they put on a great show, technically, and I will admit that it was probably mostly my fault that I didn't feel that spark becuase I was standing a bit back and not in the crowd of sweaty kids. I wasn't high. I wasn't drunk. I was sober, and caffinated, and standing with a bunch of people who needed convincing. I should've been up close. I should've been yelling "oh my god, i fucking love you!" But instead, i was standing in the VIP deck trying to get my friends excited. But nobody danced.

Throughout the night, in the backstage area, any time one of the Velvet Revolver guys would walk by, their tour manager or roadie dude, or whatever he is, would walk through the hall first clearing the way -- it didn't matter if you were just someone hanging out, working at the station, or a multiplantinum band member -- if one of the VR guys had to come through, you had to move. And if you didnt move, their road dude would take you by the shoulders and push you up against the wall. It was very Spinal Tap. Everyone just stood around dumbfounded. None of the other members of any other band insisted on such treatment. All the other bands were hanging out and having fun and joking around. So when this happened, several times, we all just stood around laughing our asses off and immitating the VR security. We also apologized that it wasn't 1988/1995 anymore.

Good Charlotte was the last show I stuck around for. I'm sorry, but they're fucking awesome. I know I've been late to the game on this, and there are times when people are like "dude, sarah, seriously, enough about GC on the blog, it's not doing you any favors." but you know what, eff that shit.

I took my two boys, Wyatt and The Vicar, to watch with me. Wyatt is Brandon's best friend from growing up and now tours with the Killers as a roadie, and mostly just a good time maker. I adore Wyatt, as most people who encounter him do. Wyatt and the Vicar PLUS Mikey equals my absolute happiness. So having my two boys there with me, might've been part of the reason why I enjoyed the show so much. Anyway, I really wanted Wyatt to see GC cause the Killers had to leave early, and I thought there might be something to their live show that he could pass on, plus, i just thought it'd be a show he'd enjoy. Well, it was easy to enjoy cause they put on a great fucking show. Everytime one of their new songs would come on, Wyatt would say "is this a new song? it's good." Which proves my point about their new material since Wyatt's taste in music is actually impeccable. At one point Joel ran from the stage and into the bleachers and sang from there. The kids went fucking nuts. The three of us smiled from ear to ear and cheered. Say what you will about the band, but you can't deny their ability to perform and entertain live. Also, they dress awesomely these days. Benji looked like Carlos D from the audience and I often had to do double takes. And I looked out into the crowd from the floor and noticed a kid far far away dressed like Joel... which is sort of a take on being dressed like Brandon, which takes everything full circle.

After their set we were all hanging out when the VR guys make every clear for the 403rd time. Eventually, an hour and a half late, Weiland showed up. As we were all being pushed up against the wall by security, i looked over and realized that i knew the main security/roadie/whatever dude of VR. It was LA Tony! LA Tony used to be the roadie for the Music when they were touring with the Vines about a year or two ago. Me and my friends loved LA Tony cause he was incredibly accomidating to all of us and would always make sure we were taken care of, not to mention, he had the best stories of all time from his days as a road manager. I yelled out "Tony!" and he looked at me and i said "I'm Sarah! I know you through the music. I'm one of Tim V's best friends!" He made the connection (or pretended to) and I wasn't pushed against the wall anymore.

While the band was on stage one of the radio djs came up to Mikey and said "dude, did you hear? You're Duff's favorite band. he really wants to meet you!" So when I saw LA Tony walk by again I called him over and introduced him to Mikey. He flipped out and was totally excited, "You have to stay here and meet Duff. He's dying to meet you!" So we stuck around, but time kept on going on, and I really wanted to shower, so I bid Mikey and Danny farewell and he got to meet Duff. It's kinda funny how these things work sometimes.

HOLY FUCKING SHIT. IT'S GLAMOROUS INDIE ROCK AND ROLL FOR ME.

The Killers got nominated for THREE GRAMMYS.

I'm literally tearing up right now.

you can make this your desktop image. it's brandon. he's been nominated for a grammy. no wait, three of them:

IN THE MIDDLE

Looking to score over the holidays? Read this first.

SO HOT

Did anyone see last night's "South Park" with Paris Hilton? It was easily one of the funniest things I've seen on South Park in a long time... maybe even on TV in general. I IMed my friends this morning telling them about it, like "and then, you heard squishy sounds... and he was dressed like a bear!!!" This is all funnier if you've seen it or know what I'm talking about it. Come over tonight to watch "The OC" with the Killers and I'll show you "South Park" afterwards since I DiVo'd it.

Scotty sent this to me, and I laughed cause I love the "Daily Show" and puppies.

Also, everyone is getting retarded for this band called Acceptance. All I know is that their album is coming out on Columbia in April and they're from Seattle... which boggles my mind cause Seattle was like 10 years ago. I listend to one song and it's like Hoobastank meets Maroon5, and yet i sort of LOVE EVERY SECOND of it. It's like OC music.

Scott has pictures of the Federlines with the new puppy, but I've got pictures of them celebrating Brit's birthday. The Brizza looks fucking awesome and my ideal man prototype, Kevin, looks FINE AS FUCK: