IT'S NOT OK

Newsflash for all my Kosher readers: STARBUCKS' CARAMEL FLAVORING IS NOT KOSHER.

Now, if you're like my brother, you're gonna be all annoying and say "how do you know?"

this is how i know:

Me: Hi. I would like to have a triple shot, venti, skim, caramel macchiato please.
Server: Do you go to Stern [the jewish girl university my SPIN offices]?
Me: No. Why?
Server: Cause the caramel we use isnt kosher.
Me: Wow. Why not? Is there like, pig in it?
Server: There's gelatin.
Me: No kidding. Thank you for the tip.

OK. So now i've injested about 30 animal's worth of gelatin and, as Rina told my brother, God is going to make me play scrabble with Paris Hilton when I go upstairs.

Speaking of Jews... Jordan Bratman, Xtina's fiance, is very much a member of the tribe. I wonder if she'll convert.

And also...

Joe Simpson = Religious Sellout/The Anti-Christ

He's Jessica and Ashlee's dad/manager/former southern baptist minister, who apparently finds it ok to drink beers with his kids. From what i've been told, southern baptist ministers dont drink and they dont talk about their daughter's big boobs in the press. And i think he has a messiah complex because in the bible it says that man was created in the image of God, and Jessica is the spitting image of him. i think he thinks he's God as a result.