Monday, February 28, 2005



First off, the oohlas are playing tuesday night in LA with the Revolution Smile at the Knitting Factory. If you're in the area, you should definitely go to this show.

Now, back to our regularly scheduled programming:

My mom asked me last night how the radio thing went on friday. I sat there blankly and said that it went really well despite the fact that i couldn't remember what I did friday on the radio. I didn't even remember that I went to KRock to hang out on Jake's show with Gideon. My mind erases after 24 hours... maybe even after 12. I sat there, thinking really hard about what she could've been talking about and suddenly I remembered. I told her "i think i fell asleep on air at one point." Prior to going to the studio I was at Greg K's house for the fourth installment of his birthday party. Leigh had decorated his apartment in pink streamers in the shape of Stars of David and Mike Goodstein plied everyone with yalmuke's since the theme was Greg K's Bat Mitzvah. It was cute seeing all my goyfriends sporting kippahs with their crosses hanging from their necks and tattoos of jesus on their arms. I had about two or three vodka/redbulls -- surely not enough to get me drunk (i dont mix myself strong drinks), but enough to subdue me at 1:45 am while I sat in KRock studios listening to Tool. Jake and Paul are great radio personalities and they seemed to be having a great time. I hope they get asked to continue their show.

Saturday, I was supposed to go taste some chaos in Asbury Park with My Chemical Romance. But with the drive being 1.5 hours long (each way) for a half hour set and the need to be back in the city early enough to attend GTBF/Jen Carlson/Jessica's birthday (which ended up being too crowded to even enter) AND some fashion photoshoot for Metropop that the Vicar and I were asked to participate in together, I didn't think that it was such a good idea to sample the chaos. Instead I spent the day brunching with Brian, shopping alone on St. Marks and with the Vicar at Century 21 (the man can smell a sale from miles away -- he's the son my mom should've had instead of me). For the photo shoot i dressed as a patriotic ballerina on crack. Vicar dressed as a sickly hipster with silver fronts. We posed as poseurs and danced to Geo's hip-hop heavy set that turned Misshapes into the party for the sexually repressed. I ended up in a Leigh/Sandra sandwich and remember hearing "no fair, i want to make out with ultragrrrl too." I think my friend Ron grew wood and promptly left.

When I got home at 5:30 am I finished watching Battle Royale (a must see!). The japanese horror flick was a lot less scary the second time viewing than it was a year or two ago when I saw it at Gideon's house, but still amazing. The basic premise is that the Japanese Government decided that the best way to beat overpopulation and an overrun of misfit children would be to choose a class by lottery to compete in the Battle Royale game. The kids are told that they're going on a class trip, are drugged, and brought to a deserted island where they need to fight each other to the death until one student is left alive (and the winner of the game). If there isn't a single winner by the end of the time limited game, all the kids will be killed automatically by the detonating necklace that is around their necks. The game is a total mind fuck where the kids realize that they can't trust anyone but themselves.

Last night Lindsay had some friends over to watch the Ocars when my mom came to pick me up for my cousin's engagement party bringing with her a pink Betsy Johnson lace tutu dress that she got me for my birthday (ever since hanging out with Ollie Oohlas, I've been sort of obsessed with finding my inner ballerina -- I think she's on to something... she's like my personal Karen O). Scott Stereogum got to meet her and told me that she's just like his mom, which is to say that most jewish moms are pretty much cut from the same mold. We (my mom, dad, and I) went to to Brooklyn for my cousin Victor's engagement party extravaganza. Victor's fiance is 17 (he's about 10 years old and she's not pregnant... they're Syrian Jews, and it's hard to explain this to people who don't know Syrians, but marrying young is totally normal and encouraged, which is a huge reason why my parents moved from the community), and so I dubbed the night "My Super Sweet Engagement Party." It was quite the affair with a shit ton of Egyptian/Syrian jewish parents and their offspring, more food than could ever be consumed by normal people, arabic music blasting in one part of the house for the old schoolers and Top 40 in the other side of the house for the high schoolers.

Dressed in my pink tutu, white mesh gloves, and an over abundance of pearls, I sort of stuck out in comparison to the the more classy gowns my extended (and future extended) family opted for. I clashed as a material girl reject, and kind of loved every minute of it. The high school girls stared at me with "who the fuck are you" venom in their eyes only to look with shock and horror when a family member would cross their line of sight screaming at the top of their lungs "Oh my gosh! Sarah! I see you on TV every day!!! Put ME ON TV TOO!" As if to say "how the fuck did that weirdo end up on tv?"

Lawrence and Rina, who had arrived to the party on NPT (Normal People Time), texted me to find out where the fuck I was. Me, being on SST (Syrian Standard Time) arrived about 2 hours late. Rina was given her first taste of our family overload -- which she thought she was prepared for by having not one, but THREE dinners at my house.

My cousin's husband and I were in the corner chatting /making fun of my intentionally retarded outfit and the lack of 17 year old boys there for me to claim as my next boyfriend when he asked me how old i was. "I'm 25 and not married yet, can you believe it? Everyone here must think i'm a Lesbian." With excitement in his eyes he asked "Are you?" "No." "Are you bi?!" "No." "Not even a little?" "No." I guess if he saw me on saturday night he would probably call me out. But i'm mostly straight. Relax Brother Lawrence.

After a couple of hours of nervousness that caused my little cousins and aunts to wonder if i was drunk (i wasn't), and lovely encounters with friends of my brother who are maybe the only cool syrian girls living in brooklyn -- hey girls! -- I ventured downstairs in my painful (but cute) shoes to get my coat and passed by a closet filled with records. I decided to be nosey and check it out and was FLOORED. The collection was only about 100-200 records big, but the best 100-200 records i'd ever seen. The Smitsh, Joy Division, New Order, Madonna, Depeche Mode, Stone Roses, Sonic Youth... each record was better than the next and I squealed in delight. When Lawrence and Rina walked downstairs I begged them to look. Lawrence said that the record collection must've belonged to the bride-to-be's father and he rushed off to go get him so I could meet him and gush about how amazing his collection was. Coincidentally, at that moment, the father came down and Lawrence introduced us. I guess that since his daughter is so young, he's about 45, which would've made him my age when most of those records came out. He asked me if i was having fun and I told him i was enjoying his record collection more than anything else and offered to DJ the wedding telling him that I'd play his collection. He said that he'd love that, but the music was up to his daughter and my cousin... So it looks like I'll just be a guest. I continued gushing to the father about his record collection and he was so nonchalant about it. Like it was no big deal that he had those records and offhandedly said that he was a fan of new music as well. "Oh yeah?" i said, not sure what to expect him to say, but assuming it'd be something along the lines of Green Day or something. "Oh, you know," he said with a casual coolness I've never encountered, "The Killers and the Futureheads."

Rina and I turned to each other with our eyes dripping out of their sockets. Did he just say the Killers and the Futureheads? Now, i'm not a huge Futureheads fan (unlike some people whose names begin with "Ka" and end with "ren"), but I can surely appreciate them and surely appreciate someone's father who could name check them in an instant while rushing around for his daughter's engagement party. He started mentioning shows he'd seen at Webster Hall (when it was called the Ritz), and Lawrence interrupted him by saying "My sister works in the music industry! She can send you CDs of new bands, right Sarah?!" (If you could've seen how excited the three of us were, you probably would've laughed) "Yeah!!! Any show you want to go to. Anything. Tell me and I'll get you tickets. No problem!" (an offer i rarely extend, cause it's not really true unless I try really really really hard and call in about 39 favors). He thanked me and jetted off to join the rest of the party. Rina and I gazed on with hearts in our eyes.

On a totally different note: I've been having dreams about Maxine, my dog, almost everynight. One was that she was dead but brought back to life some how... and only able to exist in a sort of faux-life state. She was breathing but didnt need to eat or drink or pee. She just existed and gave us the love we needed from her. Another dream was that my cousin gave me her son to hold and burp, and suddenly her son turned into a vomiting Maxine that I had to worry about all over again. Was she sick? Did she need to go to the hospital? Fears returning until I realized in my dream that she was dead. I'm starting to really miss her again. My mom and dad get really sad whenever I mention her and I got to hold and kiss her box of ashes a week ago. It's obviously not the same.

Had an exceptionally fun weekend that I'll be posting about soon, but first off, my friend Glenn is subletting his apt in brooklyn. Maybe you want to move in?

1 bedroom in a 2 bedroom apartment available from March 9th to April 9th. 4th
ave and Union in Park Slope, 100 feet to R train, close to the city. share
with 1 nice girl, 1 nice cat. $600. fully furnished, w/ full size bed.

If this sounds good for you, email

Friday, February 25, 2005


Apparently someone hacked into fred durst's sidekick or something, and posted photos of him putting it in some girl's yeah.

Thanks K-Rock for the shout out! I think I'm going to be on Jake's show tonight at 11pm-ish.

Wednesday, February 23, 2005


But good parties are DJed by the Tarts of Pleasure:

Tuesday, February 22, 2005


Thank you Rob Holmes, for directing me to this new Longwave song. Whatever they're doing here is pretty fucking great.

Did i just see the singer of Hootie and the Blowfish in a Burger King commercial while watching American Idol? Amazing.

The girl performing "Against all Odds" is actually pretty good and sort of makes me like the song. I also liked the girl right before her who couldn't sing is my favorite.

Anyone else watching?

Michael Goodstein just told me that on his radio show tonight (from 11pm-2am), which can be heard on the internet, they'll be airing Greg K's on-air birthday bash and giving away dates with Sheal!

You know when you've met someone and think "this person makes my life awesome!" and then, for whatever reason, you're separated from this love and need to tell them how you feel just because you have to? A certain trip to london a year or so ago for me did the trick, and now my friend needs to do this as well.

Please read this. Thank you.

So i'm proud of them and like to share with my other friends the fun stuff that they can check out:

Lindsay is having a return of the Ritalin Reading tomorrow! The line up is pretty fucking sweet:
* Mike Albo (Author of the hilarious new book "The Underminer" with Virginia Heffernan and star of My Price Point at P.S. 122)
* Alex Balk, aka TMFTML (also co-host)
* Patrick Borelli (Premium Blend, Conan O'Brien)
* Jessica Coen (Editor, Gawker)
* Christian Finnegan (Best Week Ever, Chappelle's Show, and the upcoming Comedy Central Presents on March 11.)
* Will Leitch (Author, Life As A Loser, Editor, The Black Table)

(Plus a surprise musical guest probably maybe!)

ALSO! Jake Fogelnest and comedien Paul Scheer are getting their own show on KRock in NYC starting today that's from 10pm - 2am. Here, in Jake's words, are the details:

Paul Scheer and I are going to be on the radio together. It’s a four night experiment that my insanely cool boss at 92.3 K-Rock in New York City wanted to try out. Every night, from 10pm-2am, Scheer and I are being thrown on the air with ONLY the following guidelines:

Don’t curse.
Make sure we play enough music.
Have fun and do whatever we want.

Hopefully it won't be a total trainwreck! Paul and I have four hours a night to do the greatest, crappy, college radio show ever. The only hitch is that we’re going to be broadcasting on a huge radio station and people will actually be listening to the damn thing.

They invited me to stop by the studio later this week and will be breaking out the air-delay thing for that since I can't seem to control my cursing.

The Today show just had Ozone on their show performing the gayest romanian song that ever was (which became popular in america because of a cute 19 year old boy in nj armed with a webcam). That was pretty awesome.

Anyway, who reading this is going to SXSW? stolen transmission is throwing a party for SPIN. it's the Official Unofficial SPIN Afterparty presented by stolen transmission. Performing (among others) will be: Maximo Park, MC Chris and Idlewild. It's at someone's house and he's got a hot tub and SPARKS is providing booze and AddVice is sponsoring. Also, Bloc Party is DJing.

The first 25 people to email me will get passes or on the list or whatever and can bring a guest. I might be able to invite more people, but at this point, there are so many people involved with the party that I wont be able to give out more passes.

Please put SXSW HOUSE PARTY in the subject line. thanks!

Sunday, February 20, 2005


Did anyone go to Misshapes last night? The shit was bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S.

Saturday, February 19, 2005


Anyone that ran into me last night probably knows I have something funny to blog about, but i'm gonna keep last night, as i keep most fun things in my life these days, a secret.

Instead, i bring you the two headed baby:

Egyptian Doctors Remove Baby's Second Head

The head that was removed from Manar had been capable of smiling and blinking but not independent life, doctors said.

Friday, February 18, 2005


Did anyone else see the OC last night? As a basically straight girl who is scared to death of vaginas (mine's always exploding), I am as blueballed as everyone else by this lesbian bullshit. They need to be filling Mischa's flask with a white wine and vicodin mixture, stat, so she could at least show some sort of chemistry. I know her acting is stiff, but the connection between two characters has never been so lacking as it has with the whole Micsha/Alex thing. OK, she is supposed to be weirded out by her recent interest in punanny, but c'mon. I've seen more chemistry between me and a can of sugar free redbull. Thank goodness I have DiVo, so i can rewatch the episode and take in all of Seth's witty popculture commentary.

I went with Karen, the Vicar and my new favorite person, Matt, to see the Music and Kasabian last night... but not before pre-partying at Karen's so we could dance with our arms in the air like a bunch of retarded hippies. I got there just before Kasabian and ran into "my family" as the Vicar calls them. They're this amazing trio of a mom (amy), son (dude, 13) and daughter (jordana, 16), and they go to shows all the time and invite me to birthday dinners and know about all the good bands before even me. I was so stoked to run into them... man, i wish i went to awesome shows with my mom when I was their age. She just took me to see Julio Iglasias.

So anyway, we went upstairs to stand on chairs since the lot of us are a bunch of fucking midgets (minus Karen, whom at 5'8, towers over her munchkin posse), and I balanced myself as I spazzed out while on my perch. I wish i got there early enough to be in the crowd and right by the stage, but I had fun regardless. Kasabian LOVES Primal Scream, the Verve, and the Stone Roses a lot. I think that if this were 1998 and Radiohead didn't exist, and i were a boy, I would've been dreaming that I was Richard Ashcroft and singing like I was what'shisface from Primal Scream. Bobby Gillespie. Oh, sweet Bobby.

I've seen the Music about 29 times or something. They used to tour with the Vines, and so my girls and I would take little trips to see the Music play and stare in awe at singer Robert Harvey's dancing and singing and Phil's maniac drumming that could've been used in a Chemical Brother's album. I was bummed out that I had to leave their show early to DJ, but I got to show the knuckles while being welcomed to the north. I sadly missed the song that makes Robert sing like kermit.

The Vicar and I went over to Bar 13 for the Broadcast party and watched Low Flying Jets, whom remind me a little of Supergrass. I drank about 4 beers and danced around with Raphael the boyfriend and his girlfriend with the awesomest body evs. I actually beatmatched... which I can actually do sometimes, but never bother with. I'm not technically where i'd like to be (though, the system at 13 isn't really ideal to try out on)... but i think i'm slowly getting there. Very slowly.

Vicar and I watched the dancers show off their best moves... one girl did some sort of helicopter propeller motion and knocked into some dude behind her. I couldn't help but laugh... it was something out of a movie and i couldn't believe how lucky i was to witness it. I don't normally laugh at shit people do, but it was truly amazing and nobody got hurt. No joke, but that girl is my new favorite dancer. My private dancer. My tiny dancer.

It was amazing to hang out with Raphael again in a situation less intense than Misshapes. I miss my nights dancing with him and Greg til 4 am. I think I spent a good 9 months with those two boys, dancing and making out behind my brother's back every night until our little drunken hearts couldn't stand anymore and their little thieving hands couldn't get their paws on drinks left on tables by patrons to save money on the expensive drink prices. This trick i learned from them really came in handy on New Years Eve when nobody wanted to spend $14 on champagne.

I feel old now. I like to sit in the corner more than take over the dance floor. I don't even like going out as much as I used to. I get paranoid and tired quickly. I want to be in bed by 1am and watch the Iron Chef as I doze of to slumberland.

I gotta run and meet my brother and Rina for dinner at my parent's house. This is Rina's second adventure to Lewitinnland... she hasn't yet been turned off by the fact that my house is now an eBay storage facility.

Rina was also kind enough to send me the following links:

Kids in DC singing and dancing along with the arcade fire.

Now the ladies can write their name in snow. Vicar watched that about seventy-five times and couldn't get over the fact that when the animation is over, the girl just stands there blinking. She doesn't even wash her hands.

In return, he sent me this link. Sushi Pillows!

And the mailman just delivered a Killers platinum plaque to me. It says my name and is white. This is what it looks like. And if you ever wondered what my desk looks like, here it it in all it's messy glory(hole).

By the way, Idlewild is fucking AMAZING. I don't care if you're listening to old or new idlewild. Karen's been sharing an email conversation she's been having with a friend about what the lyrics mean and it's totally blowing my mind. She says: "too many people hide from themselves in thier coupledom and this false belief theyre not alone if theyre 'with someone...'" Mikey IMed me to tell me how obsessed he was with the new album, particularly tracks 1 and 9. I think that's everyone's favorites off of PromisesWarnings. It's got a total Walkmen intro (appropriately, since they are in love with the Walkmen), and is just sort of uplifting and strangely close to the thoughts in my head. I want to write Roddy an email letting him know that while he's been away, his friends have become creepily obsessed with his band and his lyrics. I almost forgot how painfully obsessed I was with this band until everyone started listening to them again and reminding me how good they are.

Hey, people who read this blog, i dont think i've ever said this and I dont know if it's the Idlewild talking, but I love you. thank you for being nice and sending me nice emails. It makes me happy.

Not only does she got some big ass titties, but she's now a Homewrecker

Thanks to the Vicar for the link.

I'm not sure if he's in jail right now, but this is something you should save to your desktop just incase. I was inspired, once again, by The GayMaster.

Thursday, February 17, 2005


It appears that Xtina Aguilera is turning Jewish... specifically, into my Egyptian Jewish Grandmother, Fortunee (back me up Lawrence):


NYC show can be purchased here.

Go. Bring shrubbery and toy drums.

You all NEED TO SEE THIS VIDEO RIGHT NOW. it's the my chemical romance video for "helena" ... my vagina
has exploded. i shit you not. i held my breath for so long that nearly passed out and puked all over the Vicar's
laptop. I want to watch this video every hour... on the hour....(they drew blood).

Also, the fine folks at K-Rock Radio wrote to me last night to tell me that the video is on their site as well. You can watch it here if the above link doesn't work out.

This video is like the darker side of "Mr Brightside" by the Killers.


Wednesday, February 16, 2005



I'm so stoked. This shit is as good as the last. I am going to leave my job and stand on the beach feeding seagulls while listening to this album.

This is just a friendly reminder: Primal Scream fucking rules.
I was at a party the other night and the DJ played two Primal Scream songs in a row (old vs. new) and I wanted to cry with excitement. I wanted to find ecstasy and try it for the first time and lock myself in my room and listen to "Come Together" over and over again.

Wanna fight cancer? Get AIDS.
I wish i were kidding. It appears that doctors have managed to manipulate the AIDS virus to kill cancer cells in mice. This might be the biggest medical breakthrough this year. Jason told me that he doesn't want cancer nor AIDS in his body, and I have to agree with him on that one. However, this discovery is pretty remarkable.

In other news, Launch has the new My Chemical Romance video for "Helena." I can't get it to work on my computer, but I sent it to Karen and her response was overwhelmingly positive... she said something along the lines of "this band exists to be in videos." Can someone save it as a quicktime file or something for me so i can see it? I'm going crazy over here.

Also, I'm going to be DJing tomorrow (thursday) night at Bar 13 (13th and University) for the Broadcast party after I lose my shit at the Kasabian/Music show. I've seen the light, and it was Junior Sanchez, and so my set will be heavily influenced by him. I really can't wait. Vodka OPEN BAR 11-12. Live Performance From THE LOW FLYING JETS.

And in case you didn't know, Bloc Party will be playing at Motherfucker at the Roxy.

Newsflash for all my Kosher readers: STARBUCKS' CARAMEL FLAVORING IS NOT KOSHER.

Now, if you're like my brother, you're gonna be all annoying and say "how do you know?"

this is how i know:

Me: Hi. I would like to have a triple shot, venti, skim, caramel macchiato please.
Server: Do you go to Stern [the jewish girl university my SPIN offices]?
Me: No. Why?
Server: Cause the caramel we use isnt kosher.
Me: Wow. Why not? Is there like, pig in it?
Server: There's gelatin.
Me: No kidding. Thank you for the tip.

OK. So now i've injested about 30 animal's worth of gelatin and, as Rina told my brother, God is going to make me play scrabble with Paris Hilton when I go upstairs.

Speaking of Jews... Jordan Bratman, Xtina's fiance, is very much a member of the tribe. I wonder if she'll convert.

And also...

Joe Simpson = Religious Sellout/The Anti-Christ

He's Jessica and Ashlee's dad/manager/former southern baptist minister, who apparently finds it ok to drink beers with his kids. From what i've been told, southern baptist ministers dont drink and they dont talk about their daughter's big boobs in the press. And i think he has a messiah complex because in the bible it says that man was created in the image of God, and Jessica is the spitting image of him. i think he thinks he's God as a result.

Tuesday, February 15, 2005


Gothamist is having a birthday party tomorrow night (wednesday), and I couldn't urge you more to go. Elkland is playing and I watched their video the other day and the singer dances EXACTLY like me. It's totally uncanny... like we're dance partners separated at birth. But this isn't why you should go -- you should go cause they're fantastic and dancey like Erasure or the Killers.

Also, Stereogum and Coolfer are both DJing, so you can see who the bloggers are calling the "hottest dude bloggers that don't show their nutsacks, evs!"

More info is here.

Fluxblog is awesome. The genius behind the blog posted a remix of "You Are the Generation Who Bought More Shoes and You Get What You Deserve". I'm gonna ask Junior Sanchez to teach me how to DJ properly so i can DJ this song and blend it right into Bloc Party or something. I saw Junior DJ on friday night at the Tribeca Grand for some party and I couldnt get out of my seat for like a half hour cause i was too busy trying to study his craft. The man is a fucking genius with the way he mixes. I sat there thinking in my head "should i quit djing or should i learn how to dj?" I think i'm going to learn how to dj like a dj and not so much like a juke box. He's nice enough that I think he'd actually teach me if I asked. Anyway, thank you Scott for sending me to fluxblog.

BY THE WAY: Saints and Lovers are performing tonight at 9:30pm at Rothko (suffolk street, between delancey and rivington). So bring a bullet proof vest and check them out. Karen and I are totally fucking in love with this band and they usually start out their set with a Joy Division cover of "Atmosphere" that is so worthy of vaginal explosions that I'm gonna be releasing it in a couple of months on stolen transmission.

She's totally my new favorite popstar:

She loves the oohlas, and so i love her. Or at least i love Adi for sending me that photo.

Speaking of Duff, THIS IS AMAZING. People love Hilary Duff! Thank you to The Changes for that!

Well, I think I'm back off the wagon. I started out slowly -- a drink here, a drink there, mostly when certain people weren't looking -- and then i got more open about it, just when people stopped offering to buy me drinks. I've been promising some friends that i was gonna make a comeback/return since some people i know have commented that I haven't been acting the same lately, and pretty much assumed it was the lack of alcohol in my blood. Maybe they were right.

The other night i went to a party with ollie and mark and it was open bar and I just drank, and when i fell on the floor i drank some more. I danced with them to hip hop in a tutu and got lost in the music and the moment (i own it!), throwing my hands in the air, giving hugs, and dishing out the "i love you guys!" bomb more than i have in ages (cause it's true, i do love them). It's fun to let your guard down sometimes, i guess. Or maybe this is how i act when I'm unsupervised.

Thursday, February 10, 2005


Steal the oohlas music.

Incase you're watching TV at 7pm *TODAY*... which is now, on the east coast, put on FUSE cause they've got MUSE LIVE AT THE WILTERN. Muse is one of the greatest live bands around right now. This is up for debate, but i'm making it a fact starting right now.

And on Access Hollywood tonight I'm gonna get to hear K.Fed speak for the very first time. horay!

UPDATE: This Muse thing is fucking awesome. Matt Bellamy is one of the most underrated artists of our generation. I don't care if people suggest that Muse uses a backing guitar track... Matt Bellamy is a guitar playing genius and I like them more than Radiohead these days. Yes, Muse probably never would've exist if there was no Radiohead, however, I don't even like referring to Radiohead in the same breath as Muse. Muse deserve more than that. They deserve to have things like planets named after them. I don't care what people say about Bellamy, cause Yorke and Co have their heads lodged so far up their own asses that they stopped making listenable music (this is where you say that my taste is too simple to even understand radiohead and this is where you say i'm too stupid to understand radiohead, and this is where i tell you to go fuck yourselves, so relax, ok?). Muse makes nothign but songs i want to listen to. I walked by someone's office today and they were listening to Radiohead and i was almost grossed out. This is coming from someone who was once the biggest radiohead super fan a person could be.

Muse is everything a rock band should be. Plain and simple.

ANOTHER UPDATE: My eyes cross and my feet go numb whenever I hear the piano breakdown in "Butterflies and Hurricanes". I'm just sayin.

Did someone email me a song called "We Had Pleasure" by a band called Foreign Born? Or did someone post it on their site? I found the song on my desktop and I can't, for the life of me, remember how it got there and i like it a lot.

Here's the press release:

The Name of This Play is Talking Heads
By Marc Spitz

February 2nd, 2005 (New York, NY) Producers Laura Wagner and Jonathan Lisecki are proud to present the return of pop culture satirist Marc Spitz’s new play The Name of This Play is Talking Heads directed by Andy Goldberg at Under St. Marks (located at 94 St. Marks Place btwn 1st and Ave. A). Performances begin March 3rd and end March 26th, running Thursdays – Saturdays at 8 PM, Saturdays at 10 PM. Tickets are $15 and can be purchased by calling Smarttix at 212.868.4444 or by going to

The Name of This Play is Talking Heads skewers the vapidity of music punditry on networks like MTV and VH-1. Talking Heads takes place backstage at your garden variety music channel where an innocuous music journalist for a reputable industry magazine prepares to make his first appearance on a show of this nature. In this case it is the Top 100 Most Rockatrocious Moments in History When he witnesses how the obligatory comedian taping his segment is being force fed material and told what to say, he is shocked that these experts were not only amateurs, but they had no insight or integrity at all. When he decides to rail against the system the results may have fatal consequences!

Playwright Marc Spitz is an expert on the subject for he has been such a talking head on music cable channels countless times as a representative of SPIN Magazine. “I know I did like Sleaziest Moments in Rock for VH1 and many more that I have blocked out of my head for the pain, “ says Spitz. “The title, like all my titles, is taken from a pop album or song. In this case, the Talking Heads live album. I actually saw David Byrne at a party the other night, told him I was using the title and what the play was about and he said ‘You can do that. That sounds great.’ and smiled.”

Spitz is the author of seven plays. Among them, The Rise and Fall of The Farewell Drugs, Worry Baby, I Wanna Be Adored, Shyness is Nice, and Gravity Always Wins. He is a Senior Writer at SPIN magazine, the co-author of “We Got The Neutron Bomb: The Untold Story of LA Punk” (with Brendan Mullen) Three Rivers Press/Crown/Random House 2001, and the author of “How Soon is Never” (Three Rivers Press/Crown/Random House 2003).

Director Andy Goldberg directed and developed the hit off-Broadway production of THE BOMB-ITTY OF ERRORS, a hip-hop adaptation of The Comedy of Errors that ran for over six months at 45 Bleecker and received Drama Desk and Outer Critics Circle nominations. Other directing credits include the world premiere of The Ramones’ musical, Gabba Gabba Hey, as well as Six Available Men by Jocelyn Meinhardt (HB Studios), David Cale’s Betwixt and Benjie Aerenson’s Paradise Island (both for The New Group), Romeo & Juliet (American Stage Theater), Twelfth Night (La MaMa), and others.

Wednesday, February 9, 2005


First off, the blogging world has totally failed to mention the latest episode of the Osbournes. I stopped watching the show about 9 seasons ago, but when I saw a promo for the Kelly rehab episode, I knew i had to watch. First off, Jack Osbourne = super sluth. He was piecing together clues that he found -- a fork in the library, a candlestick in the bathroom -- to figure out that big sister Kelly was abusing drugs. For my brother it was a bit easier (ie: "sarah, what was that white pill you just took?" "oh, uh... just a vicodin... cause i uh... had a root canal." "that was six months ago." "it still hurts. HEY! THEY WERE PERSCRIBED TO ME SO THEY CAN'T BE BAD.")

Then the geniuses at MTV put together a psychedellic montage using Jefferson Airplane's "White Rabbit" to better illustrate Kelly falling down the rabbit hole of opiates, which made me want to do opiates and listen to Jefferson Airplane.

After Sharon and Ozzy dropped Kelly off at Promises rehab center, the Shazza called up Kelly's best friend Sarah's mom and told her that Sarah was not allowed to hang out with Kelly anymore (since Sarah was a REALLY bad influence on Kelly... she was really). When Sarah's mom tried to defend her daughter, Sharon unleashed her mom-beast and told the other mom that she and her daughter were hustlers (further accented by Sharon pointing out that the mom was a fortune teller) and then calling her a cunt. I think a sign that I'm 25 is that i was cheering on Sharon rather than wince with embarassment like I did when my mom and dad did that to all my friends in middle school. and high school. and they probably would still do that if i gave them my friend's numbers.

Anyway, I got the new KO cd the other day and it's actually like Kylie Minogue or even Pet Shop Boys at time. I think KO is gonna be a gay icon in about 50 minutes as a result. I think i need to listen to it while hopped up on funpills to be sure.

Tonight The Mercury Lounge is gonna be popping like it's hot.

--- 10:30 ---
--- 9:30 ---
--- 8:30 ---
The English Department
--- 7:30 ---
Dear Leader (ex Sheila Divine)

Then there's an after party that I'm DJing:

I will play Muse cause "Hysteria" makes me want to become godzilla and step on buildings and go roar.


My friend JennyPenny asked me to post about her new blog because she's is selling tons of Marc Jacobs shoes on her new blog for half off -- some of them never worn. Valentines day is just around the corner, yo. Just sayin...

Tuesday, February 8, 2005


If any of you were at my party and accidently took the wrong jacket home and discoverd a lovely passport within, this belongs to my friend Rina. Could you please simply mail the contents of the jacket to my office so I can return it to her? Thanks! No questions asked... it's just a pain in the ass to get a passport.

here's my office address:

205 Lexington Ave
New York, NY 10016.

You can address it to Sarah Lewitinn


Dear God,
Thank you so much for having one of the readers of this blog forward me these photos.


Hey, has anyone ever heard of MC Chris/MC PeePants from AquaTeen Hungerforce?

ps. the monkey photo also appeared here.

Monday, February 7, 2005


This isn't totally work safe, but it's so retarded, that it almost is.

I'm trying to imagine what the visit to the tattoo artist must've been like.

"What's the gayest thing you can design? No. GAYER."

Mary-Kate is looking really fantastic.

See her here
and here
and here.

Also, thanks to everyone who made it out to my birthday party. I had a shit load of fun and amazingly didn't have a chance to have one single sip of SPARKS cause i was too busy DJing shit with the Vicar like Muse and My Chemical Romance and Beethoven ("Moonlight Sonata" which had a bunch of people come up to the DJ table and say "holy crap. i love this song." or "this is really touching me right now." gotta love what an open bar can do to people) and "O Fortuna" from "Carmina Buranah." I think i'm going to DJ classical music everychance i get from now on. Classical and My Chem.

You can see photos here.

I got the flu for the second time in a month on friday. I can't figure out how I got the flu AGAIN since i've been dressing warmly, washing my hands constantly and have had a heating lamp by my bed to keep me warm at night. Amazingly, I was sick less last year when I was making out more. Now that I'm not making out at all, I think my immune system is down, down, down. Oh well, I don't think there are any more strains of the flu virus that i can possibly catch. At least i dont think.

The worst part about this flu bizniz was missing Jarvis at Misshapes and the Spinto Band at sin-e last night. I kept on hallucinating last night that i tried to leave my house and got lost on the way to Sin-E (which is weird, cause it's two blocks form my house) and that i had to take a cab to get there, and that i couldnt get out of my building... something about monsters and a high school movie.

Ollie just told me that the stencils for the oohlas packaging will be arriving in the next two days so i'll be able to send all those delayed back orders! So sorry for the delay!

Saturday, February 5, 2005


And now for something that wont likely be linked to on any other websites:

In September, the following email was sent out to a few bloggers:
"If there's anyone on the list above who you think would a) like the movie and b) be able to spread some hype about it in the online media, let me know so I can invite them. We're at seven now, and that's you guys, and I need three more, and no one that's e-mailed via XXXXXX really suits the bill."

which was later followed up with:

"REMEMBER: You guys have to write about this in your various media outlets, wherever possible. It's a trade -- awesome premiere for an awesome film and an awesome party for a load of new media press about the film."

You can read more HERE.

Now, the premier was on Sept 27th. Any of you remember a blog'splosion about this movie?

Here's one!

Oh, and THIS.

Can you find some others? It's like "Where's Waldo" or something.

So for any of you that had any problems with a certain New York Post article, maybe you'll have a little more insight to how things sometimes work.

By the way - I actually loved the movie, as did many of my blogging peers. I wouldn't have written about the movie otherwise. Or maybe I would've. I'm not quite sure.

Thursday, February 3, 2005


Hey kids in DC.
The Spinto band is playing at the DC9 tonight. Go see them. I think they will play "oh mandy."

Wednesday, February 2, 2005


I went to see the Arcade Fire last night at Webster Hall, and it was absolutely beautiful. The Arcade Fire is what my brain would look like if you opened it up... even the sad parts are kind of hopeful and the happy parts are optimistic organized chaos. They really filled up the hall quite well, but I wish I saw them at Bowery again -- only cause i'm really really short and spent the majority of time on my toes or hugging my friends who were near by and going "I LOVE THIS SONG!!!"

If anyone goes tonight, apparently the show turns into TRL after their first encore, and they start taking requests. I thought I was being clever by leaving as soon as the gorgeous "Backseat" was over, and missed this.

Did anyone see them on Conan last night? I DiVo'ed it and loved watching it...

Also, new yorkers... notice how one of the dudes looks like Coutner Commons? Hilarious!

Tuesday, February 1, 2005


Check out C.Lo and Dave Navarro at a recent benefit here.

Thanks to The Gay Master for that.

Speaking of ... i was telling a friend about blogs and explaining to him that each one has their own little bizarre celebrity obsession. For instance:

My Blog <3's Mary-Kate Olsen and Kevin Federline
Stereogum <3's Britney Federline
Thighmaster <3's Elisha Cuthbart but used to <3 Lindsay Lohan
Whatevs <3's Amanda Bynes
PinkisthenewBlog <3's Jamie Lynn Spears

Almost every blog has their very bizarre patron saint. I think that's kinda cute.

Can someone make me a star of david or cross that has MKO and KevFed in it so i can make it my blog's logo? Thanks!

I love this band, go to their website and listen to their songs and you will too...
Can you help them?:

so we're going on tour. and you know what
that means: we need places to play, stay,
shower, whatever. here are the dates and
where we plan/hope/pray to be. see if you
can help us fill them in.

Sat. 3/12 - jersey or baltimore
Sun. 3/13 - virginia
Mon. 3/14 - north carolina, preferably near
chapel hill

Wed. 3/16 - Sun. 3/20 we will be at SXSW but
are willing to play anything in addition to our
gigs (parties, record stores, etc.)

Mon. 3/21 - birmingham, alabama
Tue. 3/22 - memphis or knoxville, tennessee
Wed. 3/23 - philadelphia

any help is GREATLY appreciated. while we
welcome all suggestions for clubs, if you can
actually help us BOOK the show, party, or
whatever (i.e. help us do the leg work), we
would be forever in debt. please feel free to
repost this on your page, blog, whatever.

if you can help, please email us at

thank you in advance.

.morning theft.

This is my last post of the night... I'm strangely obsessed with the new Britney Spears video (i'll link it late ... tomorrow or something if you haven't seen it). It's like, if you look into her eyes, you can actually see the crazy. it's amazing. and i like the song a lot. or i think i do. i can't even tell at this point... sometimes my irony over comes my sincerity and i can't tell if i'm serious or not.