BLOGGA, PLEASE

This is a photo of Greg the Boyfriend. Who may one day become Greg the Husband and then Greg the Anulled Husband and then back to Greg the Boyfriend. So let's just call him Greg the Boyfriend.

Greg the boyfriend got the best ever MASH results known to human kind:

You will live in House.
You will drive a punk rock girl out of her mind.
You will marry a demanding bitch and have sexy kids.
You will be a spineless bastard in the bedroom.

(you'd think he hates women or something...)

Today i've grown totally obsessed with C.Lo's "Mono." I dont have a clue what hit me, but this morning I listened to the song while reading the lyrics and just sort of felt like an angstful 15 year old again and started dancing around my room and singing along like I used to when I was in high school and hating things. It made me feel like a fucking million dollars.

I think we all sold her short. Like the only way Courtney could redeem herself after all the mess she got herself into was to raise the dead... but she made a fucking great song. That should be enough. It's enough for me. I even love the bridge of the song that I didnt like before. I fucking love the chorus. I will be DJing this gem tonight for sure.

And I'm so fucking excited for tonight's show. I don't think i could ever get enough of the Killers. They make my head go crazy sometimes because they're so good. Their last track on their album sounds like a song that David Bowie could've written. There are nights when I listen to it on repeat for an hour and drift off into vike enduced sleep. It's so pretty.

WIN TICKETS TO SEE THE KILLERS!

Wanna know what all the fuss is about? Now you can, for free.

Go here to win tickets.

FIGHT CANCER

Please help the legendary Jackie Farry fight cancer.

How?

You can attend her benefit show.

You can enter a raffle and win amazing things like:
Tickets to Coachella
Vintage Playboy Collection
Signed, fram Coldplay Lithograph
Guitar from Nick Zinner (Yeah Yeah Yeahs)

Umm... and a shit load of other fantastic things that not only rule, but help fight cancer. Please help. Thanks.

COME TO A PARTY TONIGHT

Do you like to party? If so, please come to Bar 13 (on 13th and University in nyc) tonight at midnight for the stellastarr*, ambumlance ltd., killers after party! I think there's gonna be an open bar of stella beer at some point. So if you dont like to party but like getting drunk, this is also a good place for you to be.

I will be DJing along with LCD Soundsystem, DJ Oil, and Karibomb, and the Alex's (english and malfunction).

I've been dancing around my bedroom all morning, so I'm thinking that i'll probably be dancing throughout the day and until 4am. Please come dance with me, even though i dance like a drug monkey immitating ian curtis.

HOW GAY ARE YOU?

According to Spark's Gay Test I'm 38% gay. Which might explain my little escapade with Leigh "Gone Wild" Lazark.

Catrinel sent me the gay test. Here's an IM we had:

Ultragrrrl: i think i got a high score from touching someone's boobies.
scad carats: apparently. this is an easier way to find out.
scad carats: i think i got a high score from having sex with girls


Right. That should clear that up.

In something very ungay... here are photos from Mary's Tiki Wedding! They're very obviously the wave of the future.

Thank you Megadork for posting The Game of Mash on your blog. So many hours in high school were spent playing this game. Most notably back stage during the Spring Musical and the Fall Play when I was doing tech crew and trying to figure out ways to entertain everyone.

Anyway, i did mash twice with two different numbers cause I couldnt decide if I liked the number nine more then three.

Here are my results:

Using the number 3 as my favorite number:
You will live in Apartment.
You will drive a red hummer.
You will marry Ben and have 5 kids.
You will be a dj in paris.
(I know about 40 Bens, so really, this could be anyone and they're all cute.)

Using the number 9 as my favorite number:
You will live in Shack.
You will drive a pink subway.
You will marry Brian Montouri and have 1 kids.
You will be a A&R in Paris.
(I was a bit more specific about which Brian. Coincedently, this Brian just stopped by my office to give me a drawing he made me of Neil Diamond ... he used his own pubic hair for Neil's chest hair. so sexy).

Please post your results in the comment box.

THESE BUNNIES LOOK LIKE PUPPIES
I'm supposed to update my blog and discuss this weekend but i'm feeling totally uninspired cause there are some shitty people who like to talk crap on the internerd and it's making my head dizzy. So I'm gonna just sit in my glass house for tonight and hide all my stones. Actually, I'm gonna bury them.

I guess what I will mention is that I had a nice weekend. The weather was nice for the most part and the people were nice for the whole part and I went to the Killers video shoot for "Mr. Brightside" with Karenplusone and never got sick of hearing that song after 49 listens. She's got a pretty nice round up from the day. She's got a pretty nice everything if you know what I'm saying. You can see the photos from the video shoot here. You might have to sign up for Ofoto for that, which is painless.

I honestly can't believe how much I love the Killers sometimes. They make me wanna never stop dancing. And nothing makes me happier then dancing. But it's not only the Killers, it's also Franz Ferdinand. FF make me so fucking happy that i want to run down the street hugging people.

"Almost Crimes" by Broken Social Scene is also fantastico plastico. the female vocalist is Leslie Feist -- she sounds so panic'ed and urgent -- it makes me want to cry. She sings like what heartbreak would sound like. Which reminds me, Mediaeater has some fantastic photos up from SXSW. Mediaeater is such a fantastic photographer -- you can almost hear the music through his photos.
Look at: British Sea Power and photos from the greatest show i've seen in five years and the Secret Machines and the Killers and finally, Broken Social Scene.

Speaking of lovely music, Dennis Cahlo is doing a residency at Pianos starting in April. He'll be playing in the upstairs lounge at 7:30pm on every sunday. For those of you who might be wondering who he is, Dennis used to be in the Realistics and I think that Niki and Lizzy are the two biggest Realistics fans ever... i mean, apart from Audrey.

Also, I'm sad to announce that Nate the fantastic Roommate has found his very own east village studio. His departure is bitter sweet because this means that Lindsay is moving in. This is all very very exciting news. Lindsay is about to see how boring I really am and how I'm serious when I say "i like dating teenaged boys." I think i smell sitcom.

Whoa, so much for no update!

IN STEREO GUM

Scott Stereogum is DJing sunday afternoon at Pianos for the Day After Party. Johnny Cragg from the twentytwos is also DJing and Poor Harvey is performing. I dont know anything really about Poor Harvey, but after listening to one (1) mp3, I think they sort of sound like the Libertines. I like the Libertines, and i like their companion band Razorlight, so I guess I would like Poor Harvey.

Speaking of the Libertines... A Tale of Two Hoachers posted this fantastic link on their blog. Who are the Two Hoachers? Well, I know them. They're both british. One is from Essex but lives in London now, and the other is from Scotland and if it weren't for his fantastic skills as a writer/drinker/drunk you wouldn't be able to understand a word he says. I've made out with one of these hoachers, but that's not important. What is important is that they're pretty much the Libertines of the bloggaz, posting poetic gibberish mostly when drunk (and under the same name). A girl could only hope that they post more often, but alas, the Scotsman is a drunken stoodent and the other one is often busy attending to his hair. Please, you two hot men, please post more.

The link is of the two libs singing on the Jonathan Ross show.

Also, Nick Zinner from the Yeah Yeah Yeahs is having a photography exhibition starting today and ending on April 3rd at Gavin Brown's Enterprise at Passerby - 436 West 15th Street, between 9th & 10th. I'm gonna check it out tonight before heading over to NJ for shabbat dinner. I'm expecting to see lots of photos of hotel rooms.

I'M POOR

Seriously, I am. Anyone wanna buy me an ibook?

Thanks.

FOR THE LOVE OF YAHWEH!

Will somebody please post their thoughts on last night's episode of "The OC!"?

I was at Pianos last night with a fuckload of blogheads when I called Greg the Boyfriend to see if he wanted to join me at North Six for Sons&Daughters. He was like "call me after the OC" and i was like "why? it's a repeat." and he's like "no, it's a new episode!" and so i grabbed Guilia by the hand and we RAN to my house as fast as our little feet could take us and made it back in time for the second half of the show. Hi Alienhead, i'm sleeping with your mom buzz.

I met up with Greg at North Six for the Sons&Daughters show -- which was fantastic. It's like they listen to nothing but the "O Brother Where Art Thou" soundtrack and Gang of Four -- busting out a mandolin that made Greg weep and a passing around their bass guitar like a ho in a frat house. I was quite impressed to say the least by their male/female vocal charms, and i think their guitarist/singer scott has made it official: The Scottish are Producing Cute Boys. And lots of them. First Barry, then all of Franz, then J.Rice, and now SonsScott... and I wont forget the patron saint of scottish hotness: Ewan McGregor. Keep it coming, you kilt people, keep it coming.

COME ON HOME

OK, so I gotta run, but a few things before I go. Sons&Daughters are playing at North Six tonight. Not sure what time, but I'm guessing around 11 or 12. I highly recommend them to any Franz Ferdinand fan.

Kill Hannah is looking for extras for their video shoot:

Calling all Kill Hannah Fans!

Come join Kill Hannah as they shoot their first music video, for "Unwanted".

Kill Hannah is looking for faces and fans to appear in the video, to be filmed on Thursday, March 25th in Long Beach California.

CASTING CALL
TUESDAY MARCH 23RD @ 10AM-12PM
@ THE STANDARD HOTEL
IN THE MEETING ROOM
8300 Sunset Blvd
323-650-9090
To confirm: heather@nylonmag.com


Talk about phoning in your part.

I like Snow Patrol and now you might see why by checking out their juke box here: click.
they're not as good as Muse, but Nate the Roommate likes them loads. they're playing at the Bowery Ballroom April 19.

My friend Oli found this and i found it totally entertaining. Especially the factual errors about my work history.

And finally, I'm DJing with the guys from the Smiths again. Grab a bunch of black pieces of clothing and show up here:


S A T U R D A Y

A P R I L 3rd, 2 0 0 4

G I R L S & B O Y S and GBH
britpop.indie.newwave.postpunk.electro.shoegaze

present:

ANDY ROURKE & MIKE JOYCE
original members of THE SMITHS
DJ set

witness the final public date of their 15 city US/Canadian DJ tour.
they have played to sold out venues of 1400 + in Miami, LA, San
Diego, Phoenix & San Francisco.

the first 200 people in the door will be immediately eligible for a
special and private engagement on Sunday, April 04.04. so come early!

live music by:

MADISON STRAYS (live)
BASTION (live)
THE JOHN SPARROW (live)

DJs:
Ultragrrrl (Spin Magazine)
DJ Oil (Kanine Records)
Alex Malfunction (Trash!)
Alex English (Social!sm)

playing britpop.indie.newwave.postpunk.electro.shoegaze

9.30pm - 5am

18 to enter
21 to drink
please bring ID

cheap drinks $5 import beers | $5 well special

$10 w/ a flyer or print out
$15 w/ out flyer or print out
adv tix $10 @ Other Music

Centro-fly
45 West 21st Street
@ 6th Avenue
212.627.7770

Ben Sherman, Socialism, Other Music, Filter Magazine, Earlash.com, GBH,
Kanine Records

LONG TIME COMING


So I've finally jumped on the Delays wagon that I believe was started by Karenplusone about a thousand months ago. She played me "Long Time Coming" while we were in London in February and I was like "this chick is awesome, she's like a poppier stevie nicks and this song makes me wanna dance in a feild of flowers with fairies and cute boys with clean hair." and she's like "it's a dude." and i was like "great. i wanna make out with him... sober." Such dreamy vocals and sounds. Oh dear Delays, you make pot seem so expensive. who needs drugs when you've got this?

The poor people who have to sit around my desk have been listening to "nearer than heaven" and "long time coming" on a constant loop.

Last night I did Lindsay's Ritalin Readings which was so fucking fun. The house was totally fucking packed. I had no idea that people liked to watch other people read out loud. Whenever I read something to someone in my family they're like "let me just read it for myself. i can read." so the concept of someone wanting to watch someone else read for no reason at all totally blows my mind. But alas, there were about 100 people there waiting to watch us readers read. I gave a shout out to my bloggas and pour a little of my beer out for Whatevs who was in D-town.

Afterwards i went to see Americas Next Top Model with Karen plus one and cute Andy. I knew the winner would win from the very first episode. Sure, she's a little Stacker2ish, but she's like a total beauty cream campaign waiting to happen.

Then we went to see the lovely talented Johnathan Rice perform at the Living Room. Well, Andy didnt come cause he was sleepy but Karen and i sat up close and cooed every time he spoke from stage. He's scottish. Sounds like a mix btw ryan adams and chris martin and is 20. So effing endearing, it's painful. Karenplusone rounded up the night better then i feel like doing, so just go to her site. I will talk about the hickey's Sarah Wilson gave me though. Three of them actually. That was fun -- not really. She totally neck raped me in the front room of the living room and I left the venue with three gigantic bruises on my neck that are unsightly. this morning i had to do some tv thing for vh1 and the make up artist spent about a half hour trying to cover them up. i'm doing an mtv thing later today and so i'm thinking of rocking them sans make up and hair pulled back. my mom will be proud.

Go see Johnathan Rice next tuesday at the LivingRoom. You'll like it. And it's free.

Oh, and Muse's album came out yesterday. Go buy it.

DEAR PITTY SING

I've been listening to your EP a lot lately. Prompted by guilt perhaps. Prompted by needing something fun in my ears. Prompted by many things. But basically, you guys are fantastic. Your music is fantastic. Pitty Sing you make me happy that I listen to the EPs that land on my desk. I'm sad I'll be missing your show next month, but I'm sure it will be fantastic and if I were there, I'd be upfront dancing the entire time.

And also, for what it's worth, I'm sorry.
Love,
Sarah

I CAN SORT OF READ

Lindsayism and Jasper are holding their first ever Ritalin Readings at Pianos tonight and were nice enough to ignore the possibly true rumors that i can't read. I can read. Sort of. Not well, but I can.

It's tonight starting at 8pm and readers can only read for 4 minutes each.

At 10pm, the impossibly cute Johnathan Rice will be performing right next door at the Living Room. The show is free and he's worth every penny.

JUST BACK FROM AUSTIN

Alright, so i just got back from Texas. It was loads of drunken fun and loud music and bbq and little boys. Thanks to the readers of this blog who came up to say hi to me. it was so fucking awesome meeting you all.

Franz Ferdinand put on the best show i've seen in about 5 years, if not ever. My memory is such crap, but i've never felt so much joy as when I danced to "Take Me Out" while the floor below my feet bounced and two people stage dove. The chemistry between Alex and Nick is unbelievable -- totally homoerotic and sexy, you could cut it with a knife. Mind you, they played the first night i was at SXSW, so they managed to raise the bar really fucking high for everyone else. Oh, and they played "The Dark of the Matinee" aka "Hava Neglia", which was extra fucking special.

The Hives were absolutely amazing at the SPIN party, as were the Killers, the Von Bondies and the Bronx. It was one of the Hives' first american shows in a long time and the crowd was totally mental. I think i'd enjoy the hives even if i watched them on mute since Pelle is such a great frontman.

The Vice party was pretty fucking special as well. Set at some house just outside of the center of all the sxsw activity, death from above, the fever, and the stills played the backyard as cute people walked around everywhere drinking pabst and dancing inside the house to a great dj. it was like a high school party that you might see in a john hughes movie. thinking about it makes me want to cry.

MUSE TICKETS FOR BOWERY SHOW ON SALE AT NOON

Ticket's to Muse's first NYC show in 4 years go on sale at noon today. You can get tickets here. You can pretty much expect that this will sell out pretty quickly, so jump on it people.

HEY GIRL, GET ON THE DANCE FLOOR

Is anyone going to see the following shows tonight in nyc?
Razorlight at Mercury Lounge - 9pm
Johnathan Rice at the Living Room - 10pm

I am so in love with Razorlight's single "Rip it Up" ... Yeah, sure, it does sound like the Libertines minus the homoeroticisim that Kiran loves, but it's got a beat and you can dance to it and it's probably about the Queens of Noize... and they're so fucking cute, i'd write songs about them too.

And Johnathan Rice is a 20 year old scottish FOSC (friend of saddle creek) who is a singer/songwriter and not typically up my alley, but i saw him play for starsailor a couple months ago and fell into a spell. I didn't like starsailor before this show either, so i'm thinking that it's possible that Laura/temp drugged my sesame medallions.

In late breaking news, Baron talks about buying a dust ruffle.

My goodness. C.Lo is totally fooking nuts. Thanks to cumdumpster for that one.

This doesn't seem too kosher. [link from best week evs blog]

Also, Karen, where the fuck are you? Have you been kidnapped by the TCTC? If you know the whereabouts of this blogger, please tell me.

Did anyone see "I Want a Famous Face" last night on MTV? I would like to know, first of all, who pays for the surgery? Are the parent's seriously incredibly rich that they were like, "Ok, kids, we gave you really terrible genetics, so we'll pay for all these things to fix your weak features" cause to be honest, the boys weren't that bad looking. Granted, they didn't look like Brad Pitt before hand, but they didn't really look like him afterwards. But they did look pretty good afterwards -- i think they should've just tried getting their hair done and their skin fixed in the first place instead of spending all that dough on surgery. but that's just me... i mean, work with what god gives you before opting for surgery. Also, the porcelain teeth were totally unneeded. They had great teeth before hand.

MY MILKSHAKE BRINGS ALL THE BOYS...

Member of this band seem to have won the good looks lottery. Sounds like Iceland is getting into garage rock.

I'm kinda surprised that I like the Fever's new album. I figured I only liked them live and not on record. But alas, their recorded material is hot.

This Milkshake so so effing hilarious. This link is for the bassist of my favorite band.

Jews will do anything to save a dollar. Here's an IM i got from Adam:
adammandel: i just stood in line for the 2nd ave. deli thing
adammandel: it was insane
adammandel: probably a 5 hr. wait
adammandel: this homeless guy went down the line screaming "you are all crazy, its just a sandwich"

Safe for Work Porn, link from the perverts at ProductshopNYC

CAN I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE

Muse just confirmed a show at Bowery Ballroom for April 14. Please mark your calendars. No idea when it goes on sale. But Jay Belin is the fucking man for telling me.

This weekend Nate the roommate had a friend over from Tampa. We were hanging out in the kitchen and she asked me if i could recommend any albums. I drew a blank when every band i mentioned she had already played out. Then she came home a few hours later and was like "Hey Sarah, ever hear of this band called Muse? Virgin had their album on sale -- and it was an import -- and it's really great!" She heard the album on the listening station and fell in love with "Apocalypse Please" immediately. I'm telling you, the album is amazing. Anyway, i think Mandy and I are meant to be. We also both complained about the album's artwork. It's so ghetto. I'm no artist (Mandy is though), and we both complained about the font. I guess that's not much, but for such an awesome band, i would want a bit more awesome thought into the font. They should've done "typewriter" font or something i think. Oh, and Laura slash temp bought the album also and texted me saying how much she loved it.

PRINCE IS PLAYING A SECRET SHOW TONIGHT AT 11PM AT CLUB BLACK

Compare this New York Times article about Ryan from the OC with my encounter with Ryan from the OC at the Sounds show last month.

Funny. Thanks to Miss Modernage slash temp for the link.

Oh, about this posts' subject heading ... go to ticketmaster.

STOP ME OH OH OH STOP ME

So last night I totally DJed with 1/2 of the Smiths. Not only did I DJ with them, but I also danced with them to Vanilla Ice's "Ice Ice Baby" and exposed them to Bon Jovi's "Livin' on a Prayer" ... Mike Joyce, who has seriously aged about 4 years, said "I like this bassline" and i replied with something nearing unintelligible like "this song is about 20 years old, if you think it's innovative, then it must be way ahead of it's time." I have no idea what that means AT ALL. Anyway, the rhythm section was sweet and posed with fans for almost the entire night and Andy Rourke, who grew his hair out long and wears tinted shades, played some Joy Division and Pulp and even played "Bigmouth Strikes Again." Holy crap. I pretty much spent the entire night freaking the fuck out and clutching Kris saying "Holy shit, i just met half of the smiths! holy shit!" Speaking of Kris, ich bin super fantastic. He brought me the "Take Me Out" single on vinyl that had a remix of my favorite song ever. Speaking of which, i may or may not have said "that's my favorite song of all time!" to mike joyce about "take me out." Not sure.

Cutest fan of the night: Jakob from Surefire.

Oh, and dare I forget to mention that Audrey was an amazing DJ last night. She busted out George Michael's "Freedom" and got the whole fucking room dancing like they were supermodels... giving for what they take.

So I was thinking about it... if I went back in time 9 years and told my 15 year old self that I was going to be DJing with 1/2 of the Smiths the following conversation might happen:
"Hey Sarah, guess what, in 9 years you're gonna DJ with a couple of the Smiths."
"Shut the fuck up! No way!"
"Yes way."
"Holy shit. What the fuck do i do until then?"
"Well, you drink. And you drink a lot. You drink so much that you gain a few pounds, but it's ok cause you get boobies as a result."
"Awesome."

Saturday night, after failing to find the location of Daniel's engagement party, I went to CBs to DJ the Good Time Party. The boyfriends came. Sarah came. This adorable girl named Dana and her boyfriend Justin came. People danced. People offered to buy me drinks and i happily allowed them to. Brunch at Clinton Street Bakery took a lot of energy out of me (but i look forward to eating there all week long...mmm...), that i slept for most of sunday before heading over to Pianos for the Day After party where me and my friends called each other cumdumpster. Scott Stereogum is such a cumdumpster.

Oh, and i forgot to mention that i saw Fight Club. I mean, Secret Window starring Johnny Depp with Hot Ben. We ate falafels instead of popcorn and pretend we were on a date. Johnny Depp is maybe the most likable actor ever?

What happens when Jay-Z and Weezer get mashed up? Jay-zeezer.

I SAY DON'T YOU KNOW...

Yesterday was the fucking gorgeous Lindsayism's Birthday (Happy Birthday btw, i know i text you and shit, but like, i'm blogging it now cause that's what we do, us bloggers). So i went home to NJ for some shabbat dinner with the fam and to give my ninja shihtzu some kisses, and then went into the city with my brothers so they could drop me off at Siberia. Audrey was rocking the wheels of digital steel and everyone was having a really fucking great time. I saw hot Ben, made out with cute Andy, got into a near fist fight with The Minor Fall the Major Dick. OK, that last part is not true, i dont think. But the bar owner kept on buying me drink after drink. Me so ill.

UNDRESS YOUR EYES

I'm gonna be DJing (aka human jukeboxing) at two places this weekend.

Saturday: CBGBs - downstairs. 9pm-4am for this awesome party.

Sunday:
S U N D A Y

M A R C H 14th, 2 0 0 4

Tribeca Grande Hotel & GIRLS & BOYS present:

a special DJ set by

ANDY ROURKE & MIKE JOYCE (THE SMITHS)
original members of the legendary band THE SMITHS...
The pair are also currently in a new project called Vinny Peculiar.

plus:

Ultragrrrl (SPIN Magazine)
Melody Nelson (MelodyNelson.com)
Alex Malfunction (GIRLS & BOYS)
Alex English (GIRLS & BOYS

FREE Admission

10 - 2am

RSVP to sessions@tribecagrand.com with Spin/Smiths in the subject line

for other tourdates by the duo: click here

SO MUCH BUZZ

Thanks to KarenPlusOne you get to see the KILLERS VIDEO!!!

the video is really different then the one i have (which was a rough cut)... this version is so much fucking better -- i didnt think that was possible!

WIN TICKETS TO THE SPIN PARTY AT SXSW

Hey. So I've got a pair of tickets to give away for the party that SPIN is having in Austin, Texas for SXSW.

Here are the details:

Friday, March 19
Noon - 5p
Free Beer, Free BBQ, and Free Music
The Hives - 4pm
The Von Bondies - 3pm
The Killers - 2pm
The Bronx - 1pm
Host: David Cross


The way to win is by answering the following trivia question:
What's the name of Thom Yorke's son?

If you know the answer and will be in Austin, TX on March 19, post on the comment thing with your email address.

WHAT WAS I NOT THINKING?

Introducing your new favorite band Bloc Party.

Many, many, many months ago, my very hot entertainment lawyer friend, Oliver Isaacs, sent me an MP3 of a band called Bloc Party that didn't really care too much for. I think it reminded me of watered down Radio4. Then I found out that my friend Tim Vigon was managing Bloc Party, which surprised me cause they didn't seem up his alley. Then Imran was all up my ass about Bloc Party cause the singer is black just like him.

Finally, Oli sent me the link to Flux Blog where I found an MP3 by the band.

Well, fuck me. I slept on that one, didn't I? Thank you to my british friends (who all have surprisingly fantastic teeth and shower regularly) for their pressuring. And shame on me for not checking them out in London.

UH OH...

I'm Lindsay's first "Date My Friend". Not so surprisingly, nobody has sent in a response except for Ben Chappell.

THE FOLLOWING IS FOR JASPER

Here's a super early X-Mas gift. Giant Drag's music video for "This Isn't It."

RUMORS RUMORS

Someone from Berklee School of Music told me that Pitty Sing were not put together by the label and that they actually met in college. That story did seem a bit odd to me. The reason why I beileve MY source is because he doesn't actually like the band at all and is an old internerd friend.

So with that behind us, let's just hope that the band work on getting their live show down and make those EP fans, like myself, proud.

HOLY HOMOS!

A little sumthin' sumthin' for the gay readers.

LISTEN TO THE KILLERS LIVE NOW

Listen to them live: Here.

Look at them be pretty (and hear their single): Here

SUPERSIZE ROBBIE?

I'm kinda loving the new Robbie. He looks sort of huggably soft or something. Like, you know he sort of wants to snuggle with you on his couch watching the OC. My theory with boys: skinny is fantastic, but if you wanna pack on the el bees, go ahead. Make me feel less... uh... you know, thick. To be honest, for a second I was like "ack!! get that man the von bondies album and have him do some sweating to the singles" because, c'mon, i loose calories listening to "C'mon C'mon" ... but you know, he's on vacation now. Let him pack them on. It's not like he can't get laid or anything as a result.

The only thing... doesn't he sort of look like a little person in this photo? Like Station Agent size. Photo via Stereogum

TAKE ME OUT

Jesus Christ. How the fuck did i manage to forget to mention that yesterday Franz Ferdinand's album came out. Run out and buy it even if you own it digitally already. Fuck that. I have a hard copy from the label, a vinyl single, an import... and i'm still gonna buy the album cause then i'll be supporting bands that deserve support, and Franz is one of those bands. Also, their $1.5 mil paycheck is grossly exaggerated. Believe me. And even if that were the case, they deserve every last penny. They're the modern day Smiths as far as I'm concerned.

Buy the album: Here. Now. Do it. Do it.

Look at how cute Kris Chen is: Here.

Jasper has some great photos of Franz Ferdinand: Here.

Everyone loves Franz Ferdinand. Not only my homobro, but even TIME MAGAZINE. Their parent's must be proud. Read the article: Here.

Q: DO YOU THINK I'M SEXY? AND YOU WANT MY BODY. COME ON BABY LET ME KNOW.


A: Yes. Even with that sun-in hair and the chances of you saying "i only hit you cause i love you."

C'MON C'MON

I've been meaning to post all day, and all last night, but the internerd has been whack. Basically, Marc Spitz got me the most thoughtful gift a human being has ever gotten me (not including family members). He brought me back from Los Angeles the tea cup that Morrissey drank out of during his interview with him. I was holding the tea cup in Sia's office showing it to her and miming how I would be drinking tea/coffee out of it when it dawned on me: Morrissey actually put his lips on that cup and it's never been washed. I literally started jumping up and down with more excitment in my mind than ever before. Seriously. I've never been so completely excited about an imanimate object before in my life. I think the last time I felt excitement like this was over an actual human being that i was actually in love with. How shallow can I possibly be? As shallow as a tea cup apparently.

CONFESSIONS OF A....

... Really Shitty Movie. Do not, I repeat, do not, go see Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen. It's not good. This is coming from a person who would rather sit at home ordering Mandy Moore movies On Demand and viewing the deleted scenes of the Olsen Twins' "When In Rome" than make out with drunk boys. I know my teen movies, and this one was... No joke, midway through the movie, Sarah Wilson stood up in her chair, wrapped her hands around my neck and mimed choking me. We sat there loudly critiquing the film -- as if we were suddenly Siskel and Ebert -- declaring a lack of character development and repeating the incredibly stiff line delivery and shitty dialog writing. In the end of the movie (yeah, i'm gonna spoil it for you all), Lindsay's character ends up with this school friend whom she realizes is reality while the rockstar she'd been pining for was a fantasy. Mind you, the school friend literally had about 4 lines in the movie, 2 minutes of interaction with Lindsay, and the two of them had just about as much chemistry as a pair of nickles stacked ontop of each other. This left Sarah and I leaving the theatre going "OH MY GOD, worst movie ever!" While a bunch of parents stared at us like "Uh... go see something your own age you fucking hags."

SEEING DOUBLE. NO ALCOHOL NEEDED.

I was just looking at Greg the Boyfriend's friendster page and decided to look at his photos (cause I think he's cute and I haven't seen him in a long time and wanted to see something cute again) when I came across this photo. For a moment I thought "Wow, that boy standing next to Greg is really cute and looks a lot like Greg. I wonder why I've never met him before. I wonder what his story is. I wonder when I can make out with him," when I remembered... It was our last night in London and I had just professed my love to a boy and was drunk with thoughts of "what the fuck..." My belly was filled with sushi and sake and my shirt was covered in soy sauce. Needless to say, I was a wreck. Me and the boyfriends, Greg and Raph, went to Trash where I refused to drink and refused to dance and spent the night staring at the British boys who looked like Williamsburg hipsters and wouldn't even glance in my direction. I felt hopeless, unsexy, unhappy, uneverything and just declared that I wanted "to go home because I really don't feel like pulling tonight and throwing my heart around like that" (finally, right?). Anyway, in the midst of a post drunken, veering on sobriety lonesomeness, someone, maybe Raphael or Andrew or Marisa (Andrew and Marisa are both from NYC and came for the trip with us) found Greg Johnson's twin. We were in shock. We begged Greg to pose with his twin and scared the twin away by laughing and pointing. Finally someone approached the twin and tried to explain what was going on. The twin and his friends were foreign -- Italian maybe -- and couldn't really understand a word we were saying until someone pointed at Greg and then at the twin and it all clicked into place. Suddenly about 6 people were surrounding the two boys trying to get them to stand next to each other for the photo of the lifetime. Everyone, Americans and Italians, were freaking out over the resemblance. The Twins were unamused. Force was used. A photo shot. Greg is on the left.

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

SMILE LIKE YOU MEAN IT

Some things and then I'm going to bed (my lathargy prompted my mom to tell me that i was anemic when i was little... i had no clue!).

If you see this girl, please tell the police. Hopefully she's alright.

I've got some DJ gigs coming up:

Saturday, March 6: Sin-e. Asobi Seksu record release party and show featuring Dennis Cahlo from the Realistics. Lots of hotness and cute Japanese people.

Saturday, March 13: CBGBs. The Good News Party. Click on that link cause Alvin did this amazing animation movie and for the first time ever, I'm a bonafide cartoon, doing "the dance" that the mystery girls love.

Sunday, March 14: Tribeca Grand. This day will otherwise be known as the best day of my life this month. I'm DJing with Andy Rourke and Mike Joyce of the Smiths. If Marc Spitz comes, he'll have met 3/4 of the Smiths in one month. The dude gets like 100 pts in my book for bringing me back the tea cup that Moz actually drank out of. Total Buzz.

Saturday, March 17: Chelsea Piers. Fight Childhood Lukemia and drink and dance the night away. I know that it seems a lot to pay $60 at the door for an event, but after that it's open bar and nonstop ass shaking music and most importantly, it's for a really great cause.

Well, that's it for March I think.

FREE MARTHA!

Look. A little naked boy with a monkey on his head.

Martha is guilty. My mom is gonna be pissed.

Last night I had a bunch of bloggers/temp over my house to increase my dorkatude. I played them the Killers album once and then they wanted to hear it again and again. Sadly, Giulia wasn't there to fawn at images of Brandon Flowers. Tim from London came over and so Sarah Wilson made her return to Apt #3a to celebrate. Also, someone made someone else puke and my toilet broke. I kicked everyone out before 1am because I like to sleep these days. And then i forgot that I was supposed to go to Remote Tavern to meet up with Brian and Catrinel, but eeek... change of pliz-ans.

I just got Johnathan Rice's album in the mail today. He's so super fantastic. Just a simple singer song writer with a voice that varies between Ryan Adams and Chris Martin.

First a 2 headed baby and now a three headed frog? Seriously people, time to start worrying about water pollution.

SARAH'S SO EXCITING NOW THAT IT'S PURIM AND BY JEWISH LAW SHE IS REQUIRED TO DRINK UNTIL SHE CAN'T SEE NO MO. Learn more on Karen Plus One and Manishewitz.

And something very cool that Alex P sent around.

SHOPPING FOR LOVE

Last night I realized that I love Jason, and shouldnt toy with his feelings. Sorry. We'll still have the three kids. The house. The car. The Passover dinners.

PARTY ON

So SPIN's SXSW Party is officially announced. Friday, March 19, 12-5pm (I put up the wrong date before!). Here's the line up:
The Bronx
The Killers
The Von Bondies
The Hives

Hosted by: David Cross
DJ: Me!

Guess who is fucking stoked? Me. That's who.

I'VE GOT SOUL BUT I'M NOT A SOLDIER

I just got the new Killers album in the mail yesterday. Oh, not only did i get the whole mother fucking album, but i also got the music video for "Somebody Told Me" and have literally watched it several times in the first half hour of receiving it. They're on a desert -- but they're so hot already. God loves the Killers. I know it. Once you get your hands on this album you're gonna be blowing loads all over your keyboard while writing me emails saying "dear sarah, thanks for telling me about the killers." The last track sounds like the song Bowie never wrote.

OK, so the midweek report:

Monday: Went to dinner with Maureen and then went to see the acoustic Morning Theft (starring Rob Holmes) at Pianos. Rob's voice is so great and I am really starting to get worried that I'll be fucked waiting out in the rain to see them play in a couple months. They're like the Psychedelic Furs meets the Pixies -- which might sound really odd, but it works amazingly. Plus, as if they needed to win me over, they dedicated Muse's "Plug-in Baby" to me.

Tuesday: Ok, so Tuesday's plan was to meet up with my friends from high school since Allison Mann was in town from Boston. I had a work dinner first with the lovable Mikey Skinner from the Streets who looks like he has been going to the gym a bit cause his arms are looking diesel. I spent the entire night exchanging war-omance stories with Tim Vigon. Poor dude could hardly get a word in edge wise cause i spent the whole time going "...and then..."

So afterwards I went to Sin Sin to visit the high school friends, Evan, Cat, Marcus, Allison, Jon, and Noah. The music downstairs was whack and the music upstairs was so-so, so we headed over to lit where Marcus turned down free coke and Cat made out with some hot chick. I accidentally grabbed Evan's crotch for a photo. I swear it was an accident. Allison told us about teaching autistic children and I begged her to start a tardblog to make up for the one that ended. Autistic kids are not retarded, I know this. I like autistic people. It's assumed that many musical geniuses are autistic, so all those fantasies of Thom Yorke and David Byrne that I've had -- they were actually fantasies about autistic people. Anyway, it was pretty fucking awesome to see my friends from high school. It's great that now I could blurt out "it's not that I hate only vaginas, I hate cocks too. I'm asexual. I'm like Morrissey" and they know who I'm talking about. In high school I think it would've taken me a bit longer to explain "no, not chris morrissey. I mean the singer. He's not gay. He's asexual. Oh nevermind. Do we have to listen to this live phish album again?"

Speaking of high school, I was interviewing Karen O yesterday and it turned out she went to the neighboring private school in Englewood. Not only that, but I was like "oh, you graduated in 96? Hmm... I think my friend's ex boyfriend was in that year. His name was Peter and I went to see his band play the battle of the band..." and it turns out that she knew this Peter. And when I was in high school, my friend Kim, who going out with Peter, gave me a tape of his band and there was this amazing song called "Karen" on it. I was like blabbering about the battle of the bands and his band when I was like "...wait a fucking second. Are you the Karen from the song "Karen"? Yup. She is. Amazing. Small fucking world. It was a great fucking song too. I haven't heard it in like 7 years and I could still sing it for you. Sadly, I think Peter gave up music shortly after that battle of the bands performance -- which I think he lost to a band that had a violin player. Fucking violin players.

And again with the high school theme of today's blog entry: last night I had tea with a friend from high school named Jason. Jason and I used to work at Seattle City Coffee together in Tenafly where we'd stand behind a counter at 6am serving pissed off parents their coffee while doing shots of espresso and avoiding "bad" touches by patrons and our boss. The positive thing about working there was that we had to have music playing at all time and our selections included the Beatles and Sinatra. I actually loved working there and would really love to go back to working in a cafe one day. I doubt Jason feels the same way.

After talking motormouth cocaine style to Jason for a half hour (I'm so sure he only heard me go "blah blah blah blah blah blah" -- that's all I heard come out of my mouth for the love of God), I ran home so I could catch American Idol. I'm so fucking happy that Dean Martin redhead dude, who likes Sinatra a lot, won. I was swooning infront of the TV as he sang that song. He's gonna win like Kurt from Norway did. Nobody expected it, but the dude had a fucking great voice. And This dude, John Stevens, he's got a great voice. It's different from everyone's, obviously, and did you happen to notice that Nora Jones sold over a million copies of her album? This dude will too. I'm gonna go out on a limb and bet my money on it. All $17.50.

Then I dragged Lizzy into my room to watch "The OC" with me so I wouldn't have to shout across our apt going "oh my god! Did you see that!" every five minutes. Somehow I missed a "jewfro" comment from Seth *swooooooooon* Cohen. During a commercial break I made her watch the Killers video for "Somebody Told Me" and she thought the guitarist was cute. I tried to make her watch it again so I could be like "look at how cute they ALL are -- and yeah, the song is great too." But the OC! The OC was on! And then she predicted Marissa going over to that ho's house with a dress so she could come to the party. And then I predicted the Six Feet Under guy punching Ryan in the face. POW! Jordan texted me afterwards to say that he wasn't gonna watch anymore now that Anna was off the show. Dude, she's a blonde Rachel Leigh Cook.

SO MUCH AWESOME

Thank God for the Queers at Bravo! who thought that sticking Ewan McGregor on a motorcycle for six episodes (or more) and following him around the world would make for a great TV show. I think that me and my olderbro (not to be mistaken with the republicbro) will have to TiVo this lovely show so we can discuss it during shabbat dinner.

Me: Dude, did you watch it this week?
My Mom: Who?
Olderbro: Oh totally.
My Mom: Who?
Me: Ewan is like, five seconds from stripping off his pants. I'm so stoked.
My Mom: Who?
Me: Mom! Nobody! Ewan McGregor.
My Mom: Oh, he's cute.
Me: Mmmm... yes. I love him.

MY BIGGEST FEAR, REALIZED
Those close to me, and now you, know that I hate Vaginas. Baron didn't know this and sent me this link. It's sort of safe for work.

vanhuisendotcom:http://www.fingerinthedyke.ca/were_talking_vulva_mov.html
Ultragrrrl: i hate vaginas.
vanhuisendotcom: i do to after watching that.

YOU MUST BE FUCKING KIDDING ME

Do you want to know what the big fucking surprise was on "Average Joe: Hawaii"? The big fucking surprise on "Average Joe: Hawaii" was that she fucking used to go out with Fabio. No fucking way that was our surprise. I was expecting cancer. I was expecting "i've got herpes." I was at least expecting "i've got another boyfriend back home." But NOT "My exboyfriend is Fabio." Who the fuck cares? Honestly, first of all, that's not something I would make public. Why did her hunk leave? Why did that matter? Honestly, somebody tell me. Was I screaming "No fucking way!" too loud that I missed it? I feel so robbed by the producers of the series. Note to producers: Next time you say "there will be a big fucking surprise" i want you to bring Fabio TO THE SET to fuck the girl infront of the guy she choose while his hair is blowing whistfully in the wind. That would be slightly shocking.

DEAR JOHNNY DEPP

Dear Johnny Depp,
Why are you so hot? Why must you taunt and tease all of us women who are not married to you (and who do not have your babies) with your total and utter hotness? Despite your hair being over ironed straight, and despite the fact that you have "wino forever" tatted up on your arm, and despite the fact that you have yet to donate your dna to "hotness research," i still love you. This is a love that grows stronger every day. Oh Johnny Depp, how i wish i saw that band that you're in. I would've been up front like I am at Franz Ferdinand and Killers shows and been going "You guys are awesome!" Please let me touch you.